Love Hopes All Things
by GayleForce12
Summary: Second in the Love All Things series, follows Love Endures All Things. House prepares for the new life awaiting him, with Cuddy and Rachel. Will happiness, as part of a family, be possible for our diagnostician or has fate destined him for misery? You can probably understand this one without reading the previous one, but what's the fun in that?
1. All I Want

**Chapter 1: All I Want**

AN: I'm back finally! Sorry for the wait! The hubs and I went on a vacation, then I had some medical issues arise and then a billion other this came up. I am getting back to normal by now so back to this! I have the story outlined. I hope you all enjoy this trip!

Quick Recap:

When we last saw our lovely couple Cuddy broke things off with House until he decided that he wanted to be a father figure to Rachel. House was sure that was something he could never pull off. It was then that he found out that he would become a father whether he chose to or not, Cuddy was pregnant. Try as he might to distance himself from them, he found himself thrown back into their lives like a baseball thrown back into play. After several nights watching Rachel, while Cuddy worked late, his courage grew along with any hope he might have had. After a long conversation with Cuddy, late nights of contemplation, and a family trip to meet Rachel's favorite cartoon characters, House and Cuddy were reunited.

Back to our story:

The sun broke through the window, spilling light over the dozing couple, rousing them from sleep. The light hit him first and he woke to her still wrapped in his arms, with her head on his chest as she faced away from the rising sun. Moments like these were his favorite. She was sound asleep and her upturned lips showed her contentment. The day had yet to give him the opportunity to ruin the moment, which allowed him to briefly enjoy the dream he seemed to be living. That feeling was always engulfed by anxiety and knowledge of the more likely scenario, that this won't last. That his mornings waking up to this were dwindling. It was then her eyelashes fluttered open and his steel-blue eyes met her cove colored ones.

"Morning" he breathed that compelled a grin to appear on her lips.

"Good morning" She told him groggily as she placed a gentle kiss on his scruffy cheek. How perfect this morning was already and how utterly unexpected it had been for him after all these years, trapped by suffering.

There he lay with the woman who stole his attention so long ago at university and his heart as his ever stubborn taskmaster at the hospital. She was his rival and sparring partner, who grew into one of his greatest friends until she gave herself to become his lover, and fate, destiny or perhaps tragedy will transform her into the mother of his children.

"I missed this. I missed you." She breathed, tracing circles on his chest before the bliss faded from her face leaving it thoughtful.

His finger brought her chin up so that her eyes met his. "What's the matter?"

"What made you change your mind? You never wanted kids."

That was the question, wasn't it? What made him dream that he could actually pull this off? His face fell. He knew even now that he would find a way to screw things up but now he knew there was someone who believed in him. He had a reason to fight for the happiness that he desired so earnestly. A child should know their biological father. A good step-father might raise a child but he could never answer the begging questions that would burden the child for the rest of its life. He couldn't help Rachel with those questions but he could love her the best he could. His child was not yet sentenced to carry those doubts with it for the rest of its life.

It wasn't just the demons that would follow his child that changed his mind. But that so much had changed for him. Before the infarction a hope for a family was distant but not outside of the realm of possibilities, after...it was pure fantasy. He had detoxed from Vicodin and with that was forced to face both his physical and emotional pain, that he ran so diligently from. He had begun to face the possibilities in front of him.

"If I want to be happy...I have to be open to the possibilities." House offered with a furrowed brow. That was a line that Nolan had been working on with him for months now. He had feared that he would screw things up worse if he made an attempt than if he was absent altogether, but then again he wasn't in this alone.

"It's never been that I didn't want children, Lisa. It's a natural drive to produce offspring." He continued as his eyes shone a deep hurt that wrenched her heart. Most young girls dream of having a baby as soon they are bigger than one themselves. Boys, on the other hand, don't start that trail of dreams until they were well into their 20's, at least that is when some start admitting it. She didn't know much about House's childhood but it wasn't hard to tell that it was a tough one.

House was very young when he decided a family wasn't something he ever wanted. When he was a bit older when the minute possibility tempted him again but that crashed swiftly when he lost the use of his leg. Now that the possibility was real, it had blindsided him. In just the past two years he had gone from a miserable misanthropic drug addict to a clean father to be, with the hope of happiness.

"Things have changed. I've changed."

"People don't change. I've seen glimpses of this in you since our college days. You are more than you give yourself credit for." Her eyes shown of her sincerity and love. He couldn't help but ask himself why he had taken so long to allow himself to have this.

"Watch out Cuddy, isn't my ego big enough?" He joked as she pried herself from his grasp.

"It was a bit lopsided." She teased, looking over her bare should as she made her way to their bathroom. He was always too cocky when it came to his medical intuition and far too critical of himself in other aspects.

"Like some things of yours!" He shouted with a grin, wiggling his eyebrows.

She poked her head out of the bathroom, agasp. "They maybe, but you've lusted over them for years."

He took his time getting out of the bed so he could stretch his leg. After he massaged his mangled thigh into as close to working order as it could manage, he joined Cuddy in the bathroom. She was in the steaming shower, her hair drenched and wet curls laid on her shoulders.

"We have so much to do." He heard her shout over the roar of the water. He tugged back the curtain with a smile and prepared himself to join her.

"Nuh-uh! I need to get clean and that isn't going to happen if you get in here." She commanded with that managerial glare he had become such a fan of over the years.

"What are you talking about?" He asked, feigning insult.

"We always…get…distracted. We have to work today." She shewed him away.

"Alright, fine but tonight you're mine. We have 6 months before the spawn shows up though."

"Yeah, but we have all the doctors appointments, we have to talk to HR again, tell Rachel and our families, announce it to the hospital, finish your adoption of Rachel, pick a name, fix up the nursery-"

"-Move me in..." House suggested into the mirror through the toothpaste that covered his teeth. There was a pause on her side until she stuck her head out from the edge of the shower curtain.

"Really? Do you think… I mean...do you want to?"

"I'm adopting Rachel, you're knocked up with my kid, I still have a lot of my stuff over here…it's the next logical step…unless you had another idea…" His look was questioning and uncharacteristically timid. There had been a lot of change in their lives recently and he hoped this wasn't the straw that broke the camel's back. He hated the venerability that the changes had forced on him. He felt like Seligman's rats, just waiting for the inevitable and inescapable shock.

"Uh…Uh yeah, it'll be nice to have you here all the time." The shock faded from her eyes as a warm grin graced her lips before she closed the curtain and returned to her shower.

"We'll start the process with HR today. I'm sure that there will be some push back when the board finds out." She thought out loud to her self. He could feel her stress building by just the sound of her voice.

"Do we really have to tell our family…I'm sure they'll find out eventually." He joked as an attempt to ease her tension.

"Yes, House unless you want a bunch of angry Jews at our doorstep."

"It'll be fine. None of your family can play the trumpet so these walls won't come tumblin' down."He ended the phrase to the tune of "The Battle of Jericho"

"This will be your mom's first grandchild...and second. She deserves to hear it from us, instead of Wilson. We can tell Rachel tonight." Cuddy said as she stepped out of the shower, just inches away from House, and looked flirtatiously into his blue eyes.

"Let's keep it to ourselves today. We'll tell Rachel all the good news tomorrow." He whispered before giving her a gentle kiss.

"No, I want to tell her tonight before the whole hospital finds out." He really needed more time than that but he guessed that would have to do...unless he wanted to ruin the surprise. They spent the next few minutes thinking to themselves silently, preparing for the day.

"What all do you have to move?" She questioned him from the closet as she rummaged through her wardrobe.

"My piano, guitars, some books, and the rest of my clothes..." House replied stepping into a pair of jeans that he had left there. The guitars, books, and clothes might not be an issue but that piano would require quite a bit of room.

"I didn't buy this house expecting this many people to live here. We may want to look at a new place." That was just one more huge set of tasks that would be added to her already full plate.

"Mommy, the door is locked!" Rachel called from the hall as she knocked furiously at her bedroom door.

Cuddy had begun to apply her makeup, as House watched her from his place on the bed. Cuddy rushed to unlock the door and let Rachel in.

"Mommy, why did you lock… Howze, you're still here!" Rachel exclaimed as she saw past her mother and wrapped herself around his good leg. He reached down and patted her back in return.

"Aye, matey and you better get used to it because I'm moving in."

"To live?" Rachel questioned him in awe. She was a bit too young to understand any of the jokes he so desperately wanted to reply with. Instead, he just grinned and nodded.

"Mommy, is this for real?" the little girl exclaimed leaving House's side to peer around into the bathroom at her mother.

If only Rachel knew just how real it all was. She would, in a short while…but would she be ready? Rachel was still in her pajamas and had taken a seat on the bed next to House, as her mother finished getting ready. House rested his arm around the girl's shoulders and hoped this was just the beginning for them and not the beginning of the end.

AN: If you feel like a good cry, check out: [House MD] Huddy – All I want (season 7) by hannahszful on YouTube. It is beautifully edited!


	2. The Day's Misery

**Chapter 2: ****The Day's Misery**

A/N: Warning...there is a bit of fluff in this one and angst. Tell me what you think!

The following day House and Cuddy strolled into work together, side by side as if held together by an invisible field but not quite touching. She was late and he was early. As if the gossip mill didn't have enough to grind lately, this only fed it. Cuddy was a great administrator but like all administrators, her staff was very critical of her. Being seen with the hospital's biggest troublemaker wasn't new, she had nearly a year and half of that. But this entrance was different...perhaps this time it was one with a promise of permanence.

For years people had criticized her patience with him. He was the source of a majority of the hospital's legal issues. She had defended him. He had done outrageous and unlawful things but she stuck by him and oftentimes, let him off with just a slap on the wrist. She entertained his proposed deals, which often got him off from performing duties that were expected from everyone else without question. There had always been complaints about their relationship, even when it was just platonic.

Now that things were more than that, disrespect and gossip had run rampant. Since the beginning of their relationship, his troublesome ways had declined. This was convenient for her, the hospital and the legal team but unfortunate for his patients. It was his unconventional ways that helped to make his practice so successful. His taming helped to quell the objections, but the news of her possible pregnancy had stoked the fire.

Eyes turned as their strange entrance caught much attention. The rumor mill had gathered that there was trouble in paradise and that they had separated but now there was no denying that they were back together. She had planned a possible need for a slow start to her morning. Her morning was free from any solid plans. If it had gone poorly then she would have far too much on her mind and would need more time to focus herself. Since it had gone well he had, as expected, been a distraction. They were headed straight for HR, on a mission.

-Huddy-

They sat side by side, stuffed in the HR office where they had first announced their relationship over a year ago.

The two sat close, with their hand just millimeters apart, both wore a pleasant expression. It was obvious that they had not visited to file or handle a complaint. The man behind the cluttered desk shuffled around papers as he searched for the particular forms they might need. "so I suppose there has been a significant change in the relationship?"

Cuddy adjusted herself in the chair to ensure she exhibited her usual professional demeanor. "Yes, we are starting a family."

House rolled his eyes. "What she means is I'm moving in, I knocked her up, and I'm adopting her rugrat." This left the man quite aghast. Out of all the issues he had handled over the years with House, he never expected that him settling down with the dean would be one of them.

Once he shook himself out of his amazement he informed them, "Okay, I'll have to send this to the board. The hospital's policy is more strict on familial relationships between a manager and employee than it is with a dating relationship. If you could find another supervisor for Dr. House, it shouldn't be a problem, otherwise one of you will have to change positions."

Cuddy leaned forward, "There is no other supervisor for House, what kind of policy is that?" although, she should have anticipated something like this.

"It's been the policy for years. Usually, it doesn't come up because often the people in question can just move departments. Because of your position, it would make that impossible unless another supervisor was found. The only other option would be for one of you to transfer to another hospital."

Normally when she had an issue with a policy, she would bring it before the board, but this time it would be more than a little self-serving.

"I'll handle presenting it to them." She announced in her administrative voice, not allowing the frustration she was feeling to escape, as she rose, grabbed her bag, and they left the office.

She had appointed Foreman his supervisor on other occasions, but she didn't think he would accept this as a permanent position. She couldn't find him another supervisor and House couldn't function as effectively under anyone else. Foreman would not accept the position without some sort of compensation. He would be getting all the responsibility and liability with none of the added benefits. Before she hired House, he had been fired from 4 hospitals. Foreman and herself had been the only ones able to monitor his practice and retain its effectiveness. His ways were so outrageous but affective and had tainted his fellows, that learned under him. Even Foreman, who often was House's grounding procedural force, had been fired for taking similar actions. Then she thought of it.

-Huddy-

After her late arrival that morning and their meeting, her routine was in shambles. She was pretty exhausted and her day wasn't going to get any better. Thinking it would be a nice break to get lunch with House, she called his office. Foreman informed her that he had left an hour previous and they hadn't heard from him since then. She tried calling his cell but there was no answer. She was too furious and too tired to hunt him down; his interrogation would have to wait until after lunch.

It wasn't until nearly 3 that she caught sight of him. He was standing before the clinic desk awaiting his next patient file when he saw her glare from across the hall. She marched to him as she had many times, a boss on a mission.

She grabbed his jacket and pulled him further from prying ears. "House, do you honestly think that today was the best time to take advantage of my position?"

"Figured it was the last time for it before you hand Foreman my leash." He quipped.

She was steaming by this point, her brows furrowed and her lips pulled tight. How could he do this? _Why would he do this? Is this how things are going to be? Wait Lisa...he was doing clinic duty..._She thought.

"You know what you did would piss me off, or you wouldn't be doing clinic hours voluntarily." She accused with a knowing look.

"I was just hoping for some of that ass tonight." He replied with a suggestive look.

"You don't have to bribe me for sex. So it leads me back to why you were making up for skipping out on work today. What was so important for you to be gone for 4 hours?"

He just shrugged.

"I won't make you tell me now, but you better come up with a reason...and soon, or you _will_ have to start bribing me for sex." She answered playfully but with full intention to carry out her threat. His hand fiddled with an object in his pocket as he released a nervous sigh.

-Huddy-

Late that night when Cuddy arrived home, she walked into House and Rachel coloring at the coffee table, with a documentary playing in the background. There was a half-eaten box of pizza on the counter in the kitchen and it was past Rachel's bedtime.

"Never thought I would see you coloring with a four-year-old House." As she got closer to the two she got within view of their pages. They were both a little more than scribbles. "Although, I figured you would have learned to color in the lines by now." She questioned with a curious expression.

"We're having a lesson about Kandinsky and his work in..." He looked down at Rachel for her to finish the statement. She was working hard on her page as she stuck her tongue out of the side of her tiny mouth.

"Espressanism!" She answered spiritedly, still coloring feverishly.

"Expressionism" he corrected.

Cuddy was tired. It had been a long day and even longer as her body grew this other human. She just didn't have the energy to put up with any more of House's antics. "Well, I think we should work on coloring inside the lines before we start Russian art history." She remarked snidely.

"But allowing children to color outside the lines has been shown to foster creativity, which has a strong link to innovation. She could be the one to, finally, put Wilson out of a job."

"But coloring inside the lines builds hand strength and dexterity that's needed for handwriting and other important acts...like completing one's medical reports." She was still irritated at him for his skipping out on work earlier. He realized her grouchy mood was well established and pried himself up off the floor, to follow her into the kitchen.

"Isn't that why I have Goof?" He asked, when he reached her side in the kitchen, watching her clean up their pizza from earlier.

"Dr. Goff is your fellow, not just your secretary. You are her supervisor and the department head. There are plenty of things you have to sign off on in those reports." She bit as she threw the greasy pizza box behind the trash, to be taken out later. "Why is she still up anyway? It's already past her bedtime."

"You wanted to tell her tonight."

"That was before I had to work 3 hours over, quelling the worries of the board." By this time she had collapsed in a chair at her breakfast nook.

"They're a bunch of tight asses, who whine about everything. They'll get over it." House dismissed as he turned to the fridge and took a swig out of the orange juice carton. Cuddy had enough of him and at the moment just the sight of him sent rage flaring up her spine. She rose, yanked the carton out of his hands, screwed on the lid, and threw it in the trash.

"I'm going to put Rachel to bed." She said after turning to pry her daughter from her picture and start the fight otherwise known as bedtime.

-Huddy-

Half an hour later, after putting Rachel to bed and changing out of her work clothes. Cuddy entered the living room again, finding House slouched in front of the television with his feet propped up on the coffee table, which was still covered in their "artwork." She couldn't help but sigh. Why couldn't he do something to help? She stood between him and the TV as she began to tidy the coffee table.

"Too tired from your day of skipping out on work to help out at home?" She asked, making a show of her angry cleaning.

"I'll have you know that Rachel enjoyed my lesson on Russian art history and the dinner I provided."

"Right...greasy fattening pizza makes for the best dinner for a growing child."

"It does make for a great celebration dinner after announcing big news. That is...when people decide to come home from work and see their kid."

His remark stopped her efforts of cleaning. She marched up closer to him and he stood to meet her glare. "So, you are the expert now? That sure didn't take long! Maybe I could have come home if someone hadn't decided to add fuel to the fire." She bit back just inches away from him. "Why was that exactly? What made you think that would be a good idea?"

"I-"

She rose her hand to stop him. "No, I don't want to hear it. You surprised me the last week or so. But I guess I should know better than to expect help from you."

She placed the last Crayola in its box, picked up the coloring supplies and walked away in a huff.

"This pregnancy is making you a real bitch. You ask for my explanation and then you don't want to listen! Did it ever occur to you that maybe, just maybe I had a good reason?" This was more than just a normal fight. This time there was something akin to hurt behind House's words. The fury in her eyes had faded but when she opened her mouth to speak he interrupted. "No, it didn't."

He blazed past her down the hall, one hand gripping his cane and the other shoved in his pocket.

"Where are you going?"

"To tell Rachel goodnight and then I'm going to my place. Wouldn't want to cause any more havoc to your day."

-Huddy-

He quietly entered Rachel's room. The room was lit by a dim projection of the night sky, that slowly spun on her ceiling. Her brow was furrowed and her lips were tight. It was obvious that the tension between him and Cuddy was making a rough night of sleep for the small girl.

He pulled over the small chair that sat by the wall near Rachel's bookcase and sat to watch her sleep. He had to remind himself of one of the reasons he was doing all of this. Rachel was a pretty cool kid even if she was just a little sticky sprog. It was then that a memory he had long ignored, came to his mind. It was a memory of a week spent with his Oma one summer. He began to sing Der Mond ist Aufgegangen, a song she sang to him as a child. The second verse was always his favorite.

Wie ist die Welt so stille,  
Und in der Dämmrung Hülle  
So traulich und so hold!  
Als eine stille Kammer,  
Wo ihr des Tages Jammer  
Verschlafen und vergessen sollt.

(How the world stands still  
In twilight's veil  
So sweet and snug  
As a still room  
Where the day's misery  
You will sleep off and forget.)

Rachel's face began to relax, she rolled to face the source of the music and her eyes fluttered open momentarily.

"Go back to sleep" House beckoned before he began to sing to her again.

Before he knew it, she was deep in sleep and all the tension had released from her body. He couldn't help but think how innocent she looked and how long ago and far away it was that innocence had graced him. He didn't want to be what stole that from her. He wasn't going to do that but he had to leave. He had to get some air and get away from Cuddy's hormone-induced rage.

He stood up, retrieved the box from his pocket. As he stared at the open box, he thought about Cuddy earlier remarks. Telling Rachel was out the window for tonight, but he still wanted to leave the gift for her.

A/N: I do not speak German so I can't vouch for the translation. The show told us House called his grandmother Oma and that is German, so I went with the German theme and his love for music and languages. I hope you enjoyed this installation. Reviews are always greatly appreciated! Thank you, everyone, who left one for the last chapter! You brightened my day!


	3. The Best Day

**Chapter 3: The Best Day**

AN: The song for this one is "The Best Day of My Life" by American Authors. Also, I have been trying to post every Friday. I'm sorry this one is two days late! The week got away from me!

-Huddy-

The next morning, when Cuddy's alarm went off she couldn't help but reach over to the empty side of the bed that House was supposed to inhabit. She had taken it too far last night and if she wanted him to open up, assuming his motives and not letting him defend himself was not the way to make that happen. She felt terrible for it and she hoped that she had not just ruined the delicate balance that was their relationship.

After she prepared herself for the day, she took a seat next to Rachel's bed. The gentle rising and falling of her daughter's small chest brought peace to her fretful morning. A small box, which sat on the nightstand, caught her eye. The golden script on its top indicated it was from a local store, that's well known for its quality pieces. Curious, she opened the box to find a small sterling-silver locket, oval-shaped and embellished with a starburst on its front. The inside adorned a picture of Rachel as an infant; shot the day Cuddy's adoption of her was finalized. Her eyes shown with love, nearly squeezed shut by her chubby cheeks. The other side held a picture of House and herself, taken by Wilson the night he caught them together late one night in House's office. They were both smiling and almost laughing, with their foreheads rested together. It was a rare moment when all worry had faded and fled when only bliss remained. Right now moments like that seemed so far away, so out of reach.

Her eyes were misting when she closed the locket and turned it over to read the back. She saw it was engraved with the letters RJH, for Rachel Joy House. There was nothing she could do to hold back the silent tears, that man never ceased to amaze her. How wrong was she...he may have skipped work but she would have bet that this was the reason. By this time Rachel began to awaken.

"Mommy, why are you crying?" Her small voice asked as she squinted against the morning light.

Cuddy hid the box behind her back and tried to play it off. They were going to work it out...she had to work it out. She smiled to hide the regret. It was enough to fool a child, but it wouldn't be enough to fool him.

"I'm not honey. I'm just happy." It wasn't entirely a lie.

"Where is House?" Rachel asked looking around, from her place on the bed. Usually, if her mother woke her there was the distant tapping of a cane in the background, the smell of breakfast, and his muffled morning grumblings. This morning, they were all missing.

She patted her daughter's back and tried to provide a comforting grin. "He's not here, he went home last night."

"But this is his home...he said he was moving in..." Rachel asked innocently, "You look sad, momma." She reached up to cup her mother's cheek, as Cuddy had often done to her when she was sad. It only broke her heart more.

-Huddy-

Cuddy entered House's office to find him behind his desk. "Hey" She offered.

He looked up at her, over his glasses that rested low on his nose. "Is this Cuddy my boss or Lisa my girlfriend? I'm not speaking with Lisa my boss."

She stepped closer just inside the opening of his desk and the wall. "Yeah…I hear she can be a real bitch." Her eyes were somber and apologetic.

The corners of his mouth made a slight upturn before he pulled her into his lap to sit on his good leg. His arm wound around her back, as his fingers rested tantalizingly close to the emergence of her bump.

"I found the locket you left in her room last night." She admitted, avoiding making eye contact with him. He just nodded and continued to look up at her. "It's beautiful…thank you…I mean she'll love it." She finally found the courage to look down into those blue eyes. "Why don't we leave work together a little early today and you can give it to her when we tell her..."

"I don't know, what would the board say…leaving work for personal reasons…I wouldn't want to put your job in jeopardy." He mocked.

"I said a little early. And you could have just told me, you know."

"Since when have I done things the easy way?" He inquired, stroking her side and shooting her a look with his piercing blue eyes.

"I need to talk to Foreman," Cuddy said standing and straightening her skirt. House rose and opened the door between the two rooms.

"Foreman, you have been summoned by the coven's High Priestess," House announced loudly and dramatically, with a bow towards Cuddy.

Cuddy couldn't help but roll her eyes. The fellows all shared confused looks as Foreman made his way into House's office. House had plopped back down in his computer chair and rested his feet on the desk in front of him, ready to watch the show.

"House, will you excuse us?" Cuddy ordered, gesturing for him to leave them alone.

"This is my department, my office, he is a member of my team and the issue involves me." He reasoned.

"True, but this is my hospital and your attitude's not helping." She stated exhaustedly.

He lifts his hands in defense and leaves the room. But after shutting the door behind him yells, "But remember these walls are awfully thin…transparent even!"

-Huddy-

"What's going on?" Chase inquired.

"Cuddy's having a little House and is, naturally, asking Foreman to be my supervisor."

The room was dumbstruck. The three fellows all shared glances, questioning if they should even trust his answer.

"Excuse me…what?" Taub petitioned.

"You heard right. She's due in January. There is going to be a little cottage running around."

"Was this on purpose?" Taub continued

"Of course! It was only logical. We would make the best offspring. Together we've got the whole package: intelligence, good looks, and athleticism. Most of it from me of course." He defended, striking a pose.

"I don't think so. This is why you were such an ass lately. You found out and you two broke up, but now you want to try with the kid. Good for you! Although, I must say...it does make me question your observation skills."

"Which one of us accidentally knocked up two women within a month of each other?"

If the team didn't know any better, they would think that he sounded jubilant.

"Wow…you…uh…congratulations." Chase stammered as he crossed his arms, proud of his boss's progress.

"Wipe that stupid grin off your face Goof." House sneered and rolled his eyes, but she continued to smile.

-Huddy-

Cuddy rested herself on the edge of House's desk and Foreman stood before her with a questioning glare. "I have a proposition for you. I'm pregnant and that means that House's and my relationship is going to change." Foreman stood there appalled. "So the proposition is for you to be House's supervisor."

Foreman's raised one eyebrow and crossed his arms. "I suppose there is some sort of incentive for me in all of this."

"We took you back after you quit and after your prompt firing at a neighboring hospital. You owe me."

He smiled and shook his head. "So let me get this straight. He got you pregnant and for you to stay together you need me to be his babysitter but keep the same job title and pay?"

Like an unmoving statue, she was strong and dared to be moved. Unfortunately, she usually had a better rationale behind her position than 'because I said so and you are stuck.'

"I'm going to need more from you."

"I expect an answer by the end of the week."

"For what you just offered…the answer is easy, no. Who else are you going to get? House can't work for anyone who doesn't understand his process. You value his work as a doctor or you wouldn't have kept him this long. He takes pride and deserves to be the head of diagnostics and you won't take that away from him. You're about to have the family you have wanted for years…you wouldn't jeopardize that. You are more desperate for this than I am…and you're working on a time clock." Foreman answered with pure confidence, gesturing to her abdomen.

It was true, all of it and she couldn't deny it, but she wouldn't let it show on her face.

"I'll get back with you with a counteroffer." He added confidently, as he turned to enter the DDX room and rejoin the team.

-Huddy-

"It looks like it's Scleroderma. Do the tests." House commanded the team.

They all left but Goff, who approached him with that annoying grin that hadn't left her face since his announcement. "Hey-"

"Hay is for horses and other domesticated farm animals but I'm sure that any good hillbilly girl should know that."

"Yeah, cute I grew up in the country."

"I know you love the idea of me forming a happy little traditional family with Cuddy so why don't you go do your job as I asked."

"I'll be quick, old man. I'm happy for you-"

"It doesn't piss you off that an ass, like me, is having a child and you remain barren?"

"Dr. Cuddy waited a long time for this and having a family could help you. I wish I was pregnant and it hurts, but it doesn't mean that I can't be happy for you."

"That's exactly what it means."

"So…you can't be happy for anyone unless you're happy? That's pretty selfish."

"And a great characteristic for father…thanks for the pep-talk!" He leaned back and turned his shoulder in her direction, guarding himself against her judgments.

"I don't believe it. It might be unlikely for people to care for each other but that doesn't negate its possibility. You can be happy for people. I'm happy for you and I am. Growth is good."

"And when I screw it all up?"

"I expect you are both smart enough people to learn healthy conflict resolution. They have professionals for that you know. Everybody is screwed up, it just matters to what extent. Your children will be screwed up…that's part of the human condition."

"Goff, I didn't know you were such a cynic."

"I'm not. I'm a realist, who hangs on an external hope."

"Yeah, yeah, the fairy godfather in the sky..." He dismissed with a wave of his hand.

"You just have to love them and try to teach them a healthy way to deal with life."

"And years of isolation, addiction, and lack of empathy are all great signs for that."

"I didn't know you when all of that was happening but I've heard talk. I've also heard, from those that know you best, that you are better now than you were. One's inability to act doesn't speak for their knowledge of the subject. Why do you think all parents use the phrase 'Do as I say not as I do.' From what I've heard you're better than you were and you have Cuddy to help. I'm happy for you!"

-Huddy-

The two had arrived home just before five to a very excited Rachel. It was a night to celebrate so they had Krabby Patty cheeseburger sliders and fries. Following that was a viewing of the newest princess movie. House was tense throughout the movie. Cuddy gently massaged his thigh, trying to relieve some of his tension. When the credits started to roll Rachel immediately turned to Cuddy and House asking about her last surprise.

"Greg, would you go get the gift out of my bedside table?" He nodded and limped his way down the hall into their bedroom. He could hear them talking. Rachel was so excited. Would she like the necklace? It's defiantly not a new toy for her to play with. His palms were sweaty. He would let Cuddy do the talking, she was better at this sort of thing.

"Where's my present?" Rachel begged, trying to find out where House might be hiding it on his person.

"Now Rachel, that is not how we ask. But there is something we have to tell you that is better than the present." Cuddy said, patting her lap for Rachel to take a seat there. House was seated next to her but he still distanced himself.

"Now…you know how a while ago you asked if House was your dad?"

Rachel's face fell and the spark flickered out of her eyes. "Yes, he said he wasn't…and that I don't have a daddy."

This was enough to break anybody's heart. How had he let himself become so heartless over the years? It was the exact thing that he hated so much about his father. He may not have done the things that his father inflicted on him, but it began with the coldness of his heart. His hand nervously played with the box that hid in his pocket.

"That's right." Cuddy's soft eyes shone down at the child in her arms and her free hand reached for House's nervous one. "Well, we've been talking about it and he'd like to be your father. How do you feel about that?"

"Really?" Rachel exclaimed, searching House's face for confirmation, crawling closer to him.

"Sure." Cuddy elbowed him for him to give her the locket. With a sigh and roll of his eyes, he reached in his pocket and retrieved it. "And this is for you."

"Wow! It's pretty! Look mommy, grown-up jewelry just like yours!" Rachel exclaimed after prying open the box. Cuddy nodded her head in agreement. She cherished the sight before her: the man she loves and her sweet daughter. Getting to watch his soul heal and see him let himself love…and to feel happiness again.

"Turn around." Rachel immediately acquiesced, spinning around to face her mom, kneeling on the couch.

Once House got it clasped around her neck, Rachel crawled back to Cuddy. "Mommy, look how pretty!"

"Yeah, sweetie!" Cuddy said, taking the locket in her hand and opened it. "Look what's on the inside!"

"It's you and Hou- I mean daddy and me!" Rachel exclaimed taking the locket from her mom's grasp and pouring herself into it. Cuddy couldn't help but smile as tears misted her eyes. Her sweet little Rachel was going to have a father and it was House none the less. She could see the relief roll across his body but the concern stayed in his eyes.

"Rach…you can still call me House." He offered. She didn't understand and he could see her heart drop. "This is all new to me kid…we might have to work up to that."

The alarmingly hurt expression in Rachel's eyes didn't fade.

"What he means is that he will have to get used to this before you call him daddy. We can go with dad for now." Cuddy consoled, looking to House for his confirmation. With a nod of his head, Rachel understood now, or at least better.

He thought he was ready for this, but having the word "daddy" associated with him was a foreign concept. Rachel was adorable and was one more thing that could tie him to Cuddy. Relationships had never been his forte…how long could he make this last? It was too late to back out now.

Cuddy smiled seeing the looks exchanged between the two. "Rachel, what do you tell Dad for giving you the present?"

"Thank you, dad!" Rachel squealed and launched herself onto him as she encircled her arms around his neck and buried her face in his nape. He wasn't used to this level of praise or thanks from anyone. After composing himself again, he awkwardly brought one arm up around her back to pat her small shoulders.

"I'm not your father yet kiddo. We still have to go to a judge and get him to sign some papers."

Rachel shot him a sad and confused look, as tears threatened to fall. It seemed as though he could only say the wrong things today.

"We just have some paperwork to do. House isn't going anywhere. He's your dad no matter what that judge says. Look on the back of the locket, Rachel." Quickly Rachel turned it over and saw the inscription. Her half days of preschool had taught her enough to start sounding out smaller words.

"Ra…ja..ha?" She attempted, crawling to sit in her mother's lap again, so she could help her with the word; withholding a laugh Cuddy explained.

"It's your new initials, the first letter of each of your three names. R.J.H. stands for Rachel Joy House." Rachel furrowed her brow and took a double-take between the locket and the two adults.

"But my name is Rachel Joy Cuddy?"

"It is but when a child gets a new father they usually take their father's last name." Cuddy tried to gently explain, glancing between Rachel and House.

"But I like my last name. I want to be Cuddy."

"Yeah, Mom what fun is it to be normal. Cuddy is a good name." He felt like a moron for assuming she would even want his name. The kid was right, it was probably best for her to stay a Cuddy. "I'll take the necklace back and have the engraving fixed." He held out his hand for the necklace.

Rachel hid the necklace in her hands and pulled it further from him. "No! I want it." The kid didn't like the engraving, didn't like the name but wanted to keep the necklace. It was ridiculous, she would get it back. The engraving was a stupid idea in the first place.

"Or, Rachel, we could do both. You could be Rachel Joy Cuddy-House. How does that sound?"

"Yeah, both my favorite people's names!" She agreed as she plopped down in between the two adults, still mesmerized by her new necklace.

"There is one other thing Rachel. Not only are you getting House as a father but at the beginning of next year you'll have a little brother or sister." Cuddy said cautiously. She didn't know how her daughter would react and in turn, didn't know how House would respond to her- or rather their, daughter.

"Wow! I'll have someone to play with? I'm going to be a big sister like Shelly?" Shelly was a little friend, or sometimes bully, of Rachel's. She had a younger sister that went to the nursery down the hall from their class. Many days Shelly was Rachel's best friend, but there were days she liked to hold it over Rachel that she was a big sister.

"Yeah" Cuddy answered with an amused laugh.

"Can we get a little sister?"

"Well, we don't get to choose. We get what we get and we don't throw a fit." It was the perfect time for her to model her teachings.

"How do you get a baby…like where do they come from?" Rachel asked innocently and House chortled.

_Okay, Cuddy, you have read about this. You knew this might come up. Okay, I need to be calm, keep it simple, encourage her interest, use everyday opportunities, and teach privacy. _Cuddy thought nervously to herself.

"From a mother's uterus, right behind that round belly." House answered simply, pointing out her mother's growing pooch.

"There's a baby in there?" Rachel exclaimed, leaning in for a closer look.

House bent over closer to Rachel, "Yeah! Why do you think your momma is getting so fat?" Rachel's eyes bugged out, she gasped and covered her mouth, prepared for her father to be in big trouble. Cuddy slapped his arm playfully and House played hurt.

Rachel let out a giggle. "How does it get out?"

"We have to go to the hospital for that."

"When will it be here?"

"A couple of weeks after your birthday…so after the leaves fall, after your birthday, and after Christmas, when it's really cold outside." House replied confidently.

"Why do we have to wait so long?" House was quite proud of her inquisitiveness; she would surely be a smart kid.

"The baby has to grow and get stronger to leave my tummy." Cuddy piped in, finally gaining back some confidence.

"Wow!" She jumped up from the sofa, spun, and danced around in circles of joy. "Today is the best day!" She said collapsing on the floor of the living room, with the largest grin spread across her face.

-Huddy-

A/N: House might be a little ooc but he has been known to give incredibly thoughtful gifts…like the desk and the textbook her grandfather wrote! Anyway…I hope you enjoyed it. Please leave reviews!


	4. So You're a Tough Guy

**Chapter 4: So You're a Tough Guy**

A/N: I'm back on track! Hope you all enjoy!

Even though it had been a long night it was good, Rachel was very excited about all the news. That, of course, led to her absolutely refusing to go to bed, even after exhaustion had completely overcome her. After wrestling her into PJs and an extra bedtime story, Rachel had finally succumbed to sleep.

Cuddy collapsed on the couch next to House.

"That went better than expected." His eyes were distant as he rubbed his damaged thigh.

"She loves you. Did you expect something different?" Something was wrong, did he not want to do this, Cuddy thought as she turned on the couch to face him and propped her head upon her arm which rested on the back of the couch. "What's wrong?"

"The kid just wore me out." He justified and then shook himself back into their present conversation and gave an unconvincing smile. "Let's go to bed."

"You're lying." She responded sternly, eyes filled with concern.

"No, I actually want to go to bed."

She chortled at the wink he offered and laid her free hand on his knee. "Not about that. There is something else wrong."

"Yeah, there is. Let's not talk about this tonight. It was a good night."

"How is it ever going to get better if we don't talk about it?"

"Look I'm trying." He retorted sternly. "I can't talk about it if…if…I don't know what it is myself yet." His eyes were nervous and fled everywhere but her face.

She softened at his honesty. "I want to talk about it sometime…"

Then his eyes finally met hers. "Do we have to talk about everything?" He whined playfully.

"Things that affect both of us…yes." She wasn't amused. If it was something that involved their family, then they should discuss it. He was deflecting and making jokes.

"Fine, later this week. Okay?"

"Okay…thank you." She turned back to face forward and let out a sigh.

"I told you we'd talk about it this week." Defensively he threw up his hands.

"It's not you. Foreman didn't take my offer today."

"So…it's happened before, then you make them bend to your will." He ended the statement in a deep menacing growl.

"Yeah…but most of the time I have the upper hand. But he deserves something more if I expect him to supervise you permanently. He told me he'd give me his counter offer later this week."

"You can't win them all." House shrugged and reached for the remote.

She crossed her arms indignantly. "Thanks, I'll remind you of that next time you make me a ridiculous demand."

He knew he was only responsible for a small part of her irritation: it was fighting with Rachel, the fatigue from the pregnancy, her ignorance of his earlier worries, and the disadvantage she had in the deal with Foreman. "You worry too much."

"I'm going to bed." She grumbled and left in a flurry of anger.

-Huddy-

That night continued to drag on. She lay awake for most of it, assailed by the changes these next couple weeks would bring. Foreman would present her with his counteroffer, something was happening with House, next week she would have her amnio, and they would announce it to her mother and sister. Worry crept over her and lay in the pit of her stomach. What had this pregnancy done to her? She had never been a worrier. She sat on the edge of the bed; the thoughts came and went and circle back around again so fast it made her dizzy. The faster they spun, the faster her heart sped, and the faster and shallower her breaths became. Just before the panic overtook her, she left their bedroom for some calming meditation and yoga. This helped but still the worry laid heavy on her. It's all under control, she repeated, trying to convince herself.

She decided that she would take advantage of awakening so early. She hadn't gotten much sleep but she could sleep later. By the time that Rachel woke up Cuddy had already cleaned most of the house and was preparing breakfast. House followed shortly thereafter, stumbling into the room in a sleepy daze.

"Morning" She bid him, kissing him on the cheek. "I'm making pancakes. Could you finish them so I can continue getting ready?"

Cuddy sped through her routine. When she returned House and Rachel had finished eating breakfast. House sat with his feet propped on the coffee table, sipping his coffee and Rachel was busy playing with her horses on the floor. Cuddy wore a steal blue sheath dress that clung tightly to her curves, being 15 weeks pregnant she was curvier than her usual.

"Wow, mommy!" Rachel exclaimed as Cuddy entered.

"You got that right kid." House agreed as his eyes bugged out.

Rachel ran over to her mother. "Your tummy is big!" She commented gently patting the bulge. The truth was, with this dress on, it was evident that she was pregnant, but it was still just a shadow of what was to come. She could still hide it with a sensible jacket, but she wouldn't hide it today. She was Lisa Cuddy, and this was NOT going to engulf her.

She told all the major people at work: HR, the board and House's team. She was amazed that they had gotten this far without the entire world finding out, but they had. She knew that after yesterday's meeting, that soon the entirety of the hospital would know.

-Flashback-

_The board members were sitting around the table, awaiting her arrival. She crossed the room in her power suit and took her position at the head of the table._

"_I called this meeting to personally inform the board of a change in mine and House's relationship. It has progressed and, for the sake of full disclosure, we are moving in together, he's adopting Rachel, and I'm pregnant."_

_Their reactions ranged from glee for Cuddy to revulsion at the notion that she would settle down with Dr. House. Wilson, on the other hand, was beaming. He had encouraged these two to admit their feelings for one another and watched House be miserable for years but now: he was clean from drugs, with the woman he loves, and about to be a father. He was happy for them but, for a moment, his smile faded and a sliver of jealousy slipped in. Wilson never thought that, out of the two of them, House would be the one who ended up with a family. But there was still time for that, he reminded himself, and his sunny nature took ahold again. "Congratulations. Dr. Cuddy." Said, one member_

"_If I didn't know you any better, I would warn you. But if anyone could handle that man…it's you."_

"_What are we going to do about House?" Dr. Simpson demanded from the other end of the table._

"_I thought something looked different. You are just glowing!"_

"_Pregnancy looks good on you!" Another member swooned._

_The board loved her; after all, she had sacrificed so much for the hospital over the years. She deserved to take some time for herself. After the excitement had worn down and the board settled, Cuddy raised the next issue. "Dr. Simpson raised a good question. Because of the nature of our relationship, we will have to find Dr. House a different supervisor."_

_The moment those words left her lips, the protests began. None of the Department Heads on the board wanted the job, and the rest questioned anyone else's ability. "As you all are aware, in the past I have appointed Dr. Eric Foreman as Dr. House's supervisor, which has shown to be effective. I've already spoken to him about permanently supervising Dr. House. He seemed interested but insisted a change be made in the terms of his contract. We'll be continuing negotiations for the rest of the week."_

-End Flashback-

It was a rough meeting and it had been a long time since she had felt such doubt from the board. Skeptical looks and gossip had begun to follow her every movement at work. She figured that since they wanted a show that she would give them one, and this was just the dress to do that. It had always had hugged her curves so well and was one of her favorites. Today, she would work it to her advantage, as the confirmation of her pregnancy.

House walked over to her and pulled her close to him. One of his arms wrapped around her back and the other rested high on her natural waist.

"Is it too much?" She whispered.

"There won't be any doubt with it hanging out for the world to see."

She rolled her eyes, slapped him playfully on the shoulder, and pushed herself out of his grasp. "I'll be heading in early. Take Rachel to preschool. I expect to see you at work shortly after."

-Huddy-

House and his team sat around the DDX table, hard at work on the cause of their newest patient's diagnosis, when his phone buzzed.

"What's up Preggers." "Marina's daughter is sick. I need you to pick up Rachel today after preschool."

"Go home early from work? I should have tried this father thing a long time ago."

"No, you're to go get Rachel, pack her some toys, and bring her back here. She can play in your office for the rest of the day."

"What do I get for this?" He asked suggestively.

"You get to spend time with your daughter at work. I don't give out sexual favors as a reward." It was obvious that Cuddy wasn't in the mood for flirting today…but when had he ever taken her warnings?

"You might not think so, but I've come to find out that a happy Cuddy is a giving Cuddy."

"Whatever you want to think, as long as you do it. Also, one more thing…"

"Woman, you are so needy." He whined.

Her tone changed from that of business to that of pleading. "Could you stop by the store on your way back with Rachel and bring me some Blue Bunny Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream?"

He let out an amused scoff. "And why can't you do that?"

"I'm swamped today. I have questions from donors, I still need to talk to Foreman and inform the board of his counteroffer and-"

"I just started a new case..."

"House please just go get her and bring her back. I need you to do this."

"Fine, but you'll owe me." He answered in a gravelly and seductive tone.

She scolded, but then her annoyance faded to amusement. "We'll have to see about that!"

-Huddy-

House picked up Rachel at the preschool, filled her backpack with some toys from home, and then they headed to the store. As they walked in the store together, the first thing Rachel asked about was to visit the toy aisle.

A sneaky grin crossed his face. "This trip is on your mom's time so…sure." The longer he could get out of work the better. His patient wasn't that sick yet, his lackeys could handle it for now.

It was aisle after aisle of silly children's toys, all inconsequential to him. But when they reached the little girl toys, Rachel's eye was caught by a baby doll. "Look, dad, a baby like the one mommy is going to have! Can I have it?"

-Flashback-

"_Sweetie, I have something to tell you." Blythe cheerfully told a three-year-old Gregory_

_John was deployed with his unit, which left the house a place of peace. Gregory loved it when John has gone, it meant that he wasn't waiting and guessing just when the next explosion was going to hit. It meant his stomach could stop hurting and that he could play in the living room. It meant he could sit on his mom's lap and enjoy her warm hugs._

_Blythe patted the seat on the couch, indicating Greg to join her. He left his toy and ran to her, gave her a huge hug, and shone a brimming smile. "What is it, mommy?" He asked, leaning into his mother's arms._

"_Well, I got you a new toy so you could practice and get used to the idea of being a big brother!" She pulled out a generic baby doll in a plain white onesie._

_It was rare for him to get a new toy; John was very strict about only getting toys on his birthday and Christmas. 'They mustn't spoil the child.' He would say. Gregory loved to be included in the adult's activities, and Blythe always had him help cooking and cleaning. Usually, she just asked him to retrieve things or handed him a moist rag to scrub with, but he didn't know the difference. She made it fun and an exercise of independence, it left him proud of himself._

_They could only do that when John was gone to work or when he was off on a mission with his unit. When John was home, it was yelling and demanding; the small tasks weren't fun anymore. He commanded them in harsh unsettling tones. After all, Gregory was in training to become a man from the moment he could walk. That wasn't to say that they had a bad relationship, but you couldn't call it a good one either, it was never one of comfort. He and John had their times, they would wrestle on the floor or go fishing or even toss a ball back and forth._

_Gregory spent the following weeks and months taking care of that doll. It would go with them into the grocery store, eat meals with them, and he even learned to swaddle the baby when it was time for bed. He loved that doll. It was an opportunity for him to operate at a higher level. It was his chance to show off his abilities and his understandings._

_As the days went on, his mother would tell him different things about his little sibling's development and they would pretend different things with his doll. In the beginning, she showed him that he had to hold the baby's head because it couldn't hold it up on its own. Later, they pretended that the baby started to crawl and then tried to get it to walk. The baby sat next to him at his birthday party. His mother talked to him about sharing his toys and how he would get to show it and teach it._

_The day that John came home, he saw the doll that lay in the back seat of the car, next to his son._

"_What is that?" He asked gruffly._

"_It's a doll, so he can get ready to be a big brother," Blythe explained lovingly, prompting an annoyed huff from her husband._

"_Boys don't play with dolls, Blythe. We're getting rid of that thing when we get home." His eyes were hard and cold, and his shame corroded what otherwise would have been a happy reunion._

"_No daddy please!" Gregory pleaded._

"_Did I ask your permission boy?" He might have only been four, but he had seen enough to know when John was serious._

"_No" squeaked his small voice._

"_No what?" "No, sir." Little Gregory said through silent tears._

_John looked back at his son and rolled his eyes. "I'm gone for six months and look at what you did to our son. He's four now. There's no excuse for this."_

_That was the last time he saw that doll, John made him throw it in the trash when they got home. It wasn't long after that when…_

-End of Flashback-

Rachel's cries drew him from his reverie. "Dad…Daddy…House!"

"Huh? Yeah, get the doll."

A/N: My mother-in-law got my husband a doll, when he was little and she was pregnant with my sister-in-law. That way he could practice and get used to the idea of a baby. I loved the idea and so I included it. His dad was cool with it…unlike John.

Song for this is "Bad Guy" by Billie Eilish. Our couple just has some deep seated issues that are being tested.

Thank you for all who left reviews: Lois Ross, OldSFfan, dmarchl (guest), chloe2007, and calianabergman. You are so encouraging!


	5. It All Keeps Adding Up

**Chapter 5: It All Keeps Adding Up**

House arrived at Cuddy's office with Rachel, following close, as she wore her pink Henry the Hippo backpack and cradled her new baby doll.

"Here is your Nicholas Cage of the ice cream world." He remarked, passing her the small tub.

She sent him a sneer when she noticed Rachel's newest acquisition. "Where did she get that doll?"

"We stole it from the pediatric cancer ward."

"House!" Cuddy scorned, as she retrieved a spoon from her coffee bar.

"It was the only way to get her to shut up. Nag, nag, nag was all she did." He wore a playfully exasperated expression: which earned him a dirty glare from Rachel, who insisted on her innocence.

"I did not nag! We got it at the store mommy."

House glared down into Rachel's eyes, they stared each other down with furrowed brows. "Has anyone told you that you are too much like your mother?" A beaming smile spread across her face, as she returned her attention to her new toy.

"You know…buying your daughter a toy is nothing to be ashamed of." Cuddy gleamed, over a spoon of ice cream.

He rolled his eyes and left with Rachel. It was like being a tiger at a zoo, people stared into their lives, and passed their judgments. He was used to their stares and often could scare the onlookers…but not with Rachel there.

"Wow, she really has him whipped. He brought her ice cream like a little servant boy." One nurse giggled to another.

"I can't believe she lets him near her daughter. There's no telling what he could do to her." The other answered.

It took all he had not to make them beg for forgiveness, but he had Rachel with him. He knew the two nurses; his revenge would have to wait. Before he let himself be swept away by his plans, he wondered what Cuddy had heard in these same halls.

-Huddy-

"And the cravings begin." she heard from Wilson, who stood at her office door.

She glared, taking one more spoonful. "Yeah, well…I am pregnant and this was all I could think about." She chuckled.

He took a seat on her couch. "So, have you told Rachel yet?"

"Yeah, you just missed them actually; they should be in his office now." She put the remainder of the ice cream in the freezer, and then joined him on the sofa.

"I suppose it went well?"

"Wilson, it went great!" She was so excited. "House even got her a beautiful locket with our pictures in it and had it engraved."

"Wow, did you drug him?" That comment earned him a stern look and slap on the shoulder.

"No! Apparently, that's why he skipped out on work Monday. I wish he would have just told me."

"He doesn't like people knowing he has a heart."

She thought of how hurt and embarrassed he looked when Rachel objected to taking his name. It wasn't his fault that he assumed she would. Cuddy had always had the typical American dream: a husband and two kids that held their father's name. House was not the marrying type, but there was something attractive about her children carrying his name. Although, Rachel's insistence about keeping the name Cuddy did make her proud, and she was glad they could make a compromise.

"Wilson, he was so good with her. She asked us where babies came from and I just froze."

"And he answered? He didn't make her watch a nature documentary did he...or worse?"

She laughed, that did sound like him. But something had changed after he got clean from Vicodin and had found hope for happiness. "No, he was honest and informative, enough for a four-year-old at least. He was really great."

He had never seen her eyes like they were now. They held hope and excitement for what the future might bring. Cuddy and he had spoken many times about the guys she was dating. Often, her dates could be confused for a casual business meeting. This couldn't be confused for anything else but love, with a hunger for a future.

-Huddy-

Hours later, after receiving Foreman's counteroffer, a wearied Cuddy peeked her head into House's office. He was deep into a medical text; his glasses lay low on the bridge of his nose. Rachel sat in the floor holding her new doll, with other toys strewn around her.

"I just finished my meeting with Foreman. Did you talk to Foreman about his offer?" she asked.

He didn't raise his gaze from the page. "Of course, don't you know me at all?"

"Rachel honey, please go sit at the big table," She pointed into the DDX room "while I talk to House."

"Ooooo, you're in trouble!" Rachel replied in a sing-songy voice, as she gathered some toys and turned to leave.

Cuddy closed the door behind her and waited until the child left. "So, you're the one who gave him the idea to take my job!"

"He asked for your job?"

There was a fire in her eyes and her tone was erratic. "Not in so many words. He asked for a forty percent raise and a position as the Assistant Dean of Medicine."

"Yeah, because he couldn't have come up with that all on his own." Sarcasm dripped from his lips as he took off his glasses and shot her a glare.

Cuddy halved her distance from him. "But he talked to you?"

"Do you think he could keep it from me? When has Foreman ever led with my advice? Although, that does sound like the sort of outrageous thing that I would offer. Good for him." He returned his gaze to the journal.

"So, you agree that it's crazy?" Cuddy's nostrils flared and her temper kindled.

"No, I think he has some balls to come to you with that, but it's reasonable. You're going through a major life change, and he's taking advantage of it."

"Are you suggesting that I can't handle being pregnant and my job?"

"Of course you can!" He patronized. Her eyes hardened, while hurt shot down her body. "I'm saying no _one can_ handle having your job and manage a personal life."

"Then what is the point of any of this?" She motioned between them. "If you don't think we can have both...I thought this is what you wanted!" She collapsed in the seat in front of his desk.

"I want us to be together and I want to keep you as my boss, I just broke you in." He finished with a wink.

"If you think I can't have both then what do you expect me to do?"

"I expect you to do what you always do, be a badass administrator and do what needs to be done."

_Was that supposed to be a compliment?_ She didn't know what to think about all of this. "But you think I'll fail to keep both a family and control of my hospital?"

"I think there are only 24 hours in a day. People should sleep about a third of that, and I've seen you work the other sixteen hours, on not so rare occasion."

Her anxiety and fury shot her out of the chair. "At least I work. Half the time I have to hunt you down for you to do your job! I'm going to be late getting home tonight."

"Of course you are." He answered bitterly. It wasn't that he was upset about her not spending enough time with Rachel. It was that she was too obstinate to see that she couldn't handle everything that dared require her attention.

-Huddy-

"It could be a blood clot."

"That doesn't explain the skin." Foreman shot down Chase's proposal.

The patient's symptoms were worsening, and even after an hour of deliberations, they hadn't come any closer to an answer. House hadn't spoken in quite some time and rested his head on his cane, staring intently at the blank space in front of him.

From across the room Rachel interrupted, "Are we going home soon?"

"Does it look like we are ready to go home?"

Her eyes sank with disappointment. "When are we going home?"

"Later, now be quiet." His tone was harsh.

Her constant interruptions were throwing the whole team out of stride. Their course of thought had been mingled with the whispers of pretend play from Rachel. House had shown more patience than they thought he was capable of, but the smoke of frustration began to seep out with his words.

"It may be just dry skin, he did just get back from Vegas," Goff suggested.

"What about meningitis?"

Crash! Rachel had bounced his tennis ball and knocked over glass containers from his desk, shattering them on the carpet. House closed his eyes and sighed.

"I'll get it cleaned up." Goff volunteered.

"That's why the hospital hires janitors." House huffed.

Goff continued to walk into the neighboring office. "I can hear the brainstorming just as well in there as I can in here."

"I don't need your help, Goff." Anger burned in his throat, as he rose to aid the little hellion.

"I never said you needed it…but that doesn't mean it isn't nice. This'll help me think, go sit back down."

That little fundamentalist Christian wack-job, he raged. If she wants to clean up Rachel's mess, I'll let her. He rubbed his leg and continued ruminating on the case.

He could still hear her patient instruction to Rachel. "Go get me the trash can."… "Rachel, this is why we don't play with balls inside." … "Yeah, but your daddy is an adult and is better at controlling the ball." The more he heard the more he was infuriated and the more his mind clouded.

"I'm going for a walk." He couldn't take it anymore; he had to clear his mind.

-Huddy-

Mr. Edwards, a local CEO and long-time donor to the hospital, sat in Dr. Cuddy's office to discuss the ongoing changes. While he was not the easiest person to deal with, she would never have thought of him as an aggressive or demanding man. He, like any business professional, wanted to protect his investments and took seriously the allocation of his money.

"What brings you in today Mr. Edwards?" She was seated in the Lawson chair that sat at the corner of the couch, where Edwards sat.

"I'm troubled by some matters about the current conditions here, concerning your supervision of Dr. House."

"Yes, I am sure that you are. The board and I are working out arrangements to remedy that situation as quickly as possible." It felt like this was the thousandth time that she had explained this.

"And what exactly are these arrangements?" His light gold and aged skin shown under the lights of the office and contrasted sharply with his crisp white shirt.

"On previous occasions when we had to redirect control of the diagnostic department, one of Dr. House's team members was particularly effective in overseeing him. We plan to permanently redirect authority over Dr. House to him if an agreement can be reached. The final offer will be presented to him by the end of next week." Her tone was firm and confident.

"You have fought tooth and nail for Dr. House's continued employment at this hospital and have admitted that he is the hospital's greatest asset. Is he willing to give up control of his department?"

"That isn't the plan." His response was cold and unyielding. "Then what exactly is it? Because if my support for this hospital is expected to continue then I need to know it is in good hands."

"I am going to abdicate some responsibility of the hospital to the man previously mentioned. He is a great doctor, has strong moral character, and is stubborn and intelligent enough to oversee Dr. House." It had become a battle of wills, although in recent weeks she had felt a decline in her resolve. She hoped it would be enough to endure her current onslaught and that it was purely a result of her raging hormones.

His brow furrowed, she had yet to quell his apprehensions. "Dr. Cuddy, I was surprised to hear of your relationship with Dr. House. I believed you to be a logical professional, who ran her personal life as orderly as this hospital. Dr. House, on the other hand, strikes me as quite the opposite, one with a lack of respect for the rules and who is overly reliant of his intuition. It concerns me-"

The fire that rose in her eyes was obvious when she interrupted. "With all due respect Mr. Edwards, it is none of your concern whom I decide to have a relationship with. I have known the man since my days as an undergraduate and better than anyone else. I am the same person, whose judgment you trusted, now, as I was when you first began your support of this hospital."

"Ah, so you have known him that long and you admit being very close. Tell me; just how long has this affair been going on? Is your personal attraction to this man, the reason you have fought so hard to keep him, through all his appalling lawlessness?"

Flames of fury shot her straight out of her seat. "Edwards! How dare you come in here and insult me by suggesting such a thing! We have the board's full support on this matter. If you feel that you can no longer trust me and the board by extension, then maybe it is time that you take your money elsewhere, or you can put aside your superficial judgments and continue to trust the same people who held your trust before all of this."

Edwards rose to his feet and looked down his nose at the angry administrator. "I'm afraid that I might have to do just that. At least until the current issues have resolved themselves. Good day, Dr. Cuddy."

Edwards showed himself out of her office. She collapsed back into the chair, with a sigh. She thought she was ready for the dissension that would follow, but seemed to have overestimated herself.

-Huddy-

"Dad...daddy...House!"

"What do you want?"

"I'm hungry!"

"We just ate."

"That was lunch!" She complained, resting her two little hands on his knee.

"And it's only..." he looked at his watch, "eight o'clock." He let out a sigh. "Do you really need to eat?" He joked.

Rachel shot him an, are you serious look.

He fished his phone out of his pocket and began to make a call.

"Wilson, come get Rachel." "Well hello to you too, House. Rachel has two parents and I'm not either of them."

"Come on! My patient is dying."

"What about her mother?"

"Her mother died over a decade ago, so don't worry there isn't some poor heart that you need to console, other than Rachel's."

This earned a stern glare from Wilson, on the other side of the phone. "House"

"Since she hasn't called to scream at me for not bringing shorty home, I assume she's still working."

"House...fine, I'm heading over there," Wilson grumbled as he slipped on his shoes and left his loft.

"She's hungry so you'll need to feed her too." House got out before Wilson hung up on him.

"Wilson's coming."

"I don't want Wilson! I want to eat! I want to go home!" Rachel pleaded, getting ever louder and stomping her feet.

"Chill, he's going to feed you and take you home."

"No! I want you! I want Mommy! I want to go home! I'm tired of this place! I'm hungry!" She was crying and screaming by this point. Her face was red with anger as she threw herself on the floor. The team had arrived just in time to witness the meltdown. They stood in shock, wondering how House would react, and then Goff crossed the threshold.

"Rachel, sweetie…you said you were hungry?" Goff asked calmly, gently placing her hand on the child's shoulder. A tear-stained face nodded in confirmation.

"Okay, come here." Goff beckoned the child as she walked into the DDX room, opened the drawer of the desk, which sat in the corner, and pulled out a chocolate chip granola bar.

Rachel sniffled away a few more tears and took the bar. "Thank you." She hiccupped.

"Dr. House, would you like me to take her to Dr. Cuddy's office?"

"No Mary Poppins, I've got it from here." House spat.

Rachel sat on his good leg and rested her head in the crook of his neck, nibbling torn pieces of the granola bar. Between bites, she rested her wet and sticky hand on his chest, at the opening of his shirt.

Soon, he saw a night alone at his apartment, with a nice full glass of scotch. He rubbed his throbbing thigh and thought: am I ready for two of these; I nearly completely lost my temper with her. She had every reason to be upset; it was well past dinner and her bedtime. He needed some air, but he was trapped here until Wilson showed up. The walls of his life were closing in: his recent failures as a father, the restraints a child put on him, the expectations of his girlfriend, and the approaching death of his patient.

She was hungry...he had thought of it!

-Huddy-

It was late when Cuddy caught sight of House limping his way through the lobby.

"House, where is Rachel?"

"She's at your house with Wilson."

"You mean our house?"

"Sure, look I'm going to go to the apartment tonight."

His eyes were tired and beaten, nothing like they were when he had just solved a case. "Did you diagnose your patient?"

"Yeah, it was a tumor. We missed it on the first scan." He looked older, his shoulders hunched from the long day.

There was something more going on with him. "Did you find it in time?"

"Maybe, either way, she's Wilson's patient now."

"Are we okay? You can talk to me about whatever's going on."

"When are we not okay?" He managed a faint grin before he walked out.

A/N: The song for this one is Green Day "Basket Case" Thank you for the reviews from calianabergman, OldSFfan, myragumm, Lois Ross, and chloe2007 and the guest!


	6. Turn Turn Turn

**Chapter 6: Turn, Turn, Turn**

A/N: Another chapter for you all, I hope you all enjoy! Thank you for all the reviews! Things are about to start speeding up some. Song for this chapter is Turn, Turn, Turn by The Byrds, there is a time for everything.

She didn't see him the next day at work. She wouldn't even have known he was there if it wasn't for the busy whispers amongst the staff. Apparently, two nurses had called in this morning for personal reasons. As word had it both of their husbands received emails about their partner's other lovers and House came in asking about them. She couldn't help but smile at their his antics. Those were two of the biggest yentas at the hospital, it was about time that they get a taste of their own medicine.

House wasn't her only worry, she was starting to think that the rest of her career would be composed of defending their relationship. Her inbox was exploding with complaints from donors who were upset with her unprofessionalism. "Dating an employee, none the less the one who causes the most trouble, was a recipe for disaster." Or her personal favorite: "We are disappointed to hear that our Dean of Medicine got knocked up by the hospital's biggest liability and out of wedlock." That was coming from a woman starting on her fourth husband. Then there was the issue of calculating if Foreman's offer was even possible. She hadn't even begun to work on that, by the time she finally had to pull herself away for nourishment.

It was well past her usual lunch hour when she made her way to the cafeteria. The hissing of gossip seemed to slither with her down the halls. "I heard he was her TA in school and that was the only reason she passed biochemistry." "I heard it was an accident, some doctors they are." "That's why she hasn't sacked him…she wanted in the sack with him." It seemed that the ones not whispering cut their eyes judgmentally at her, in the halls. She had never experienced this kind of disrespect and choked back tears by the time she made her way back from lunch.

-Huddy-

House spent the previous night with a bottle of scotch, in front of the TV in his apartment. He had to think through some things. It was all too much...it was all…to real. He was glad that he didn't have a case, although it would have made a great distraction. Taking advantage of his long hours last night, he did some research on those nurses and sent a few…memos…to their husbands. Now, with just his thoughts for company, something which used to haunt him. He knew what Nolan would say when he told him. "You have lived with the pain from your own thoughts so long, you invite them for company rather than risking inviting happiness, however temporary." He was right but that didn't make all of this any easier. He hoped that Cuddy would allow him some space the following day. There would be no dodging of clinic hours nor other kinds of fooling around, he wouldn't give her a reason to hunt for him.

-Huddy-

She had gotten so wrapped up in work that she missed Marina's first phone call, asking if she would be returning late today. Then when she did finally leave, she was so busy she forgot her laptop and all the budget reports she needed to review. By the time she had retrieved the papers, it was pretty late when she finally did arrive. It was well past dinner and Rachel was already preparing for bed.

"Where is House?"

Cuddy regarded the tension in her daughter's eyes. "He's at work."

The girls head fell to stare at her fidgeting hands, "I miss him."

"I know…me too, sweetheart."

"Tell him to come home, you're the boss."

"I wish I could."

Rachel's bath continued, but now it was less like washing a little girl and more like sponging a sick patient. She sat in the tub, shoulders slumped and head down.

"He'll come back." Or at least she hoped so.

"Did I do something wrong? Does he not want me anymore because I had a fit in his office." She asked through a sniffle, as her red puffy eyes met Cuddy's.

"No, sweetie! He still loves you. He's just at work." Cuddy wanted to scoop her up and hold her.

"If he's at work…why do you look so sad?"

"I guess I just miss him." She did miss him but right now she was also furious at him…and absolutely worried about them. It was heartbreaking to see Rachel this upset. _If only he could see just how much his absence had affected Rachel._

-Huddy-

Cuddy walked in late and exhausted the next morning and was immediately met by her assistant who bombarded her with problems, complaints, missed phone calls, appointments, and various other emergencies. Her hands were already full of files from the late night of number crunching before her assistant handed her more and more packets of papers. All she could manage was to nod and distance herself from the oncoming storm, safely behind the door of her office.

Moments later Wilson walked in, finding Cuddy leaned over her desk with her head buried in her hands. "Hey, you looked so flustered I thought I better come and check on you."

That's when he heard her sniffling and noticed her face rimmed with red, she was crying. He crossed the room and knelt by her side.

"Cuddy, are you alright?"

"Sure, I'm just…I'm just swamped. Maybe House was right, I can't handle this." She managed with some strength returning to her voice. Wilson rubbed her back and shot her a curious look. "This…my job, the pregnancy, and my family."

"Cuddy, I don't know if any one person can handle what you do. There's no shame in that."

"I guess he already talked to you about this?"

"About what?"

"Foreman's counter is that he helps run the hospital and a substantial pay increase." Her eyes were a stormy grey, absent of their usual prevailing drive.

"Your job is to do what is best for the hospital. You staying in charge is what is best for the hospital but how long can you keep going at this pace? How long would you have been happy, without House and the pregnancy? If, what is best for the hospital means that you get help, a lackey to take up some slack…then that's what you need to do. It doesn't mean you have failed…it means you had to make another sacrifice for the good of the hospital."

Another burst of tears shot out as she threw her arms around his neck. "Thank you, Wilson."

"The board will approve it. You have sacrificed so much for this hospital and have brought us this far…they would follow you into hell if you asked them too." He could feel her smile in the crook of his neck.

"Now that you aren't crying so hard…let me check your blood pressure." He rose and fetched a BP cuff.

_Maybe he's right, Foreman does have the makings of a good administrator. He can talk up donors, stand up to House effectively, demand respect, and has good judgment. It would be nice to spend more time at home with my family._ She hoped that while she worked on figuring out a way to make the transition work financially that she would think of a viable alternative. But she had yet to devise another option.

"It's 142 over 91. I'll make you some herbal tea to calm your nerves."

"I'll take it again in an hour or so. Have you seen House yet this morning?"

Wilson was at her coffee station, fixing her tea. "No…I assume you would have…you're sleeping with him."

"Not last night…or the night before." Her voice faltered again and was nearly drawn back to tears. "I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me."

"You're stressed, exhausted, overwhelmed and your boyfriend is an ass. None of this is your fault." He handed her the tea. "I'll tell you what," He pulled out his script pad and began to write. "Fill this, go home, take one and get some rest."

"I can't. I have to meet with the board and present Foreman's offer. I have a million things to do today."

"I'll take it to the board and all the rest can wait until you have gotten a good day's rest."

-Huddy-

House, who was in the DDX room, pulled keys from the keyboard, one by one, when in marched Wilson.

"What in hell are you trying to do?" The oncologist's tone was tight with anger.

"What does it look like?"

"I mean with Cuddy. She came in late this morning and I found her crying at her desk."

"I just needed some space. She's being dramatic."

"Of course she is being dramatic. She is running a hospital, caring for a four-year-old, is 15 weeks pregnant and her boyfriend, the father of her children, ran off without any explanation. She hasn't slept and she's completely drained." There have only been two times that House had seen Wilson close to this angry, and both times, the floor ended up littered with glass.

"I'm not Rachel's father yet-"

"The hell you aren't! She was the reason Cuddy was late this morning. She wouldn't leave until you came home. It took Cuddy an hour to talk her into going to school today."

"I'll be there tonight. I'll talk to Cuddy at lunch."

"She won't be there. I took her BP, she was hypertensive, 142 over 91. I gave her a script for some SSRI's and sent her home."

House's attention had fallen away from the prank he was planning. His eyes stood wide with new understanding.

"You know the trouble she's had with pregnancies in the past…you know how high risk she is… Don't be the reason she loses this one."

House shot up out of his seat, grabbed his things and began to leave.

"Where are you going?" Wilson called after his friend, who was halfway out the glass door.

"Home."

-Huddy-

When Cuddy awoke and entered the living room, she found House and Rachel asleep together on the couch. That was exactly the sight she wanted to wake up to. She hoped that this meant he had dealt with whatever his malfunction was two nights ago. Her presence was enough to raise him from his slumber.

"Did you have a good nap?" A quiet grunt was all she got in return before he slipped out from under Rachel.

"Look, about the other night. It wasn't the fault of either of you. I've spent the last three decades alone; I just needed some space."

"That doesn't mean you have to leave!" She would never accept that excuse from him. She deserved more than that.

"What the hell am I supposed to do?"

"Go sit outside for a few hours, or God-forbid, talk to me and tell me what's going on!"

"I nearly screwed up the adoption announcement…then I spent all day with her in my office while trying to solve a case. I forgot to feed her! I couldn't leave so I called Wilson. She threw a fit and I just stood there like a moron."

"Rachel loved the surprise! You were the one who explained where babies come from while I just sat there." She grabbed his hand. "I should have taken her from you. I knew you were working on that case."

They sat together, letting the silence speak for them. "I guess we will have to find a house where you will have your own private office."

"A man cave." He suggested, waggling his eyebrow.

"At most a jam room, with books and a desk…"

-Huddy-

The couple sat on the couch. Cuddy leaned against him while they each read a book. Rachel was playing in the floor, happily ignoring the adults, just yards away. Her warm body against his drew his attention away from the pages before him and his hands began to wander. She gently fought his advances, shooing his hands away from their intentions, but he was persistent.

"Stop Greg, there are little eyes."

He dropped his book, pulled out the thin summer throw that rested on the back of the couch, and spread it over them. She smiled but was determined that his persistence wouldn't win her attention. But if she hadn't desired his it, then she wouldn't have accepted his solution.

His hands wandered her body, caressing her growing waist. His delicate touch was warm and sent tingles shooting through her spine. He crept his way up her torso, flirting with the base of her sloping breasts. His hands traveled south for some teasing he knew would release her from her professional facade and would drive a further rise in body heat.

Her sham was up, he had noticed her lack of progress in reading. She had been stuck on the same page for far too long, to be honest, she had been stuck on the same two words far too long. Even if that had gone unnoticed, her racing pulse and shallow breaths were sure to give it away.

"I think it's time for bed." House breathed into her ear, breaking the trance he induced on her.

"Yeah, I'll put her to bed. Then I'll put you to bed." She said flirtatiously and gave him a teasing kiss as she rose to her feet.

She was beautiful. She had always been beautiful but even now, as her waist expanded, she was stunning. It was purely a biological response to tie him to the mother of his children. But was that such a bad thing?

"Come on Rachel. It's time for bed."

"What? No!" She pleaded.

"You might not be tired, kid. But we're going to bed and that means you have to also."

"Just a little longer?"

"I'll tell you what, if you brush your teeth and get your pajamas on then we can put off the bath til morning."

Rachel's ears perked up at his offer; she had a very strict bedtime routine. Being allowed to put off any part of it was always an opportunity worth taking!

"Greg" She scolded.

"Lisa, lighten up."

"Fine." He was right; she did need to allow some variance in routine. It would keep them from being overly reliant on it and make for a relaxed atmosphere to their home. If there was one thing they all needed, it was a comfortable home life. "Come on Rach." She said, offering the child her hand.

Rachel went to bed easy, even though she was still awake when Cuddy shut her door.


	7. Bad News

**Love Hopes All Things: Chapter 7 Bad News**

A/N: Sorry this one took me so long! Thank you, as always for all the reviews! They are much appreciated! I hope to get the next chapter out on schedule…it is all planned out.

Their weekend was peaceful. House managed to keep Cuddy from spending the bulk of it immersed in the hospital's financial reports. They lay in bed, reading, and fending off thoughts of the events approaching the following week. The thoughts swarmed their minds like gnats, a mass of small irritating things accompanied by the occasional pinprick.

Her contemporary romance wasn't enough to wave off the insult of her anxiety. _How would her amnio go? How is their baby developing? Will Foreman accept her offer? How will her family react to their announcement? How will House handle everything? How will she react to his reaction? What about Rachel in all of this? _She took a sip of her warm herbal tea.

She lifted her head from the pages of her book and viewed him thoughtfully. "Greg, I need your support this week."

"Come on Lisa, when have I ever let you down?" He didn't raise his eyes from the page. He knew that she struggled waiting for outcomes she had no power over.

"Are you serious?" She regarded him questioningly.

"I'll be there." He met her gaze.

"I need more than just you to be there. I need you to not interfere with the appointment or test and for you to be as nice as you can to my family. In other words, try to keep your mouth shut."

"Consider it," he promised, pulling an imaginary zipper across his lips.

They both returned to reading, he began calculating how he could get around not offending the mother bear. The appointment and testing weren't going to be an issue, he trusted Kraydel and they could rerun the test if they felt it was needed. As for the mother situation…it might take a little help. As an addict, he had to be careful about how he handled difficult situations. Alcohol, drugs, avoidance, and blunt assertiveness were out of the question, he would have to figure out something… There were few people in this world, which made him more infuriated than her mother. When she wasn't being bitchy…she was…okay, but that was few and far between. They soon switched off the lights and settled in each other's arms to sleep.

-Huddy-

She sat in the room alone, dressed in a hospital gown, waiting for Dr. Kraydel to return and begin the procedure. House had a new patient which he said required his attention. Of course, when did he ever actually see a patient… She was convinced that it was because he didn't want to watch the test.

"Hello, Dr. Cuddy! Are you ready?" Dr. Kraydel asked as he entered. "I'm sure you are aware of how this procedure is performed."

She nodded as he prepared the ultrasound machine and revealed her stomach. The machine came to life and the cold gel hit her skin as he spread it with the transducer. It was quiet and the odds were too great for something to go wrong for her to dare look at the screen. By the grimace on his face, she knew things didn't look right.

"What is it?" She requested with trepidation.

"Dr. Cuddy, it looks like here that the fetus has a cleft palate but there are more troubling abnormalities here," He indicated on the screen. "with its skull and here with its heart. These are typical indicators of Trisomy 13." He paused letting the news sink in, before continuing with the options that awaited her.

His words were white noise in the background of her thoughts. She knew what this meant…she knew their options. There was little chance that her baby would live. She wiped the tears from her face and cleared her throat. "Doctor could you print those images for me."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'll have to tell Greg."

"Sure, Lisa…and I'm sorry."

She startled awake, shortly before melting into a puddle of silent tears. This was going to be another long week…well a long month.

-Huddy-

The following night Cuddy and House managed to leave work together on time. She, of course, brought home the remainder of the papers that she needed to work through for the final proposal for Foreman. Last week was busy and Rachel was desperate for some attention from her mother.

"Mommy, look at my coloring!" She begged, shoving the page in front of her eyes.

"Yes sweetie, very good. I'm busy, go show it to House." She was relieved to hear the pitter-patter of feet fading back into the living room. The serenity was short-lived though.

"Mommy, I wrote a song!" Rachel exclaimed running back into the dining room with two pencils and proceeded to bang her beat at the edge of the table.

"Wow, now go work on it some more and you can show me again before bedtime." Cuddy propositioned, not raising her eyes from the papers.

"But mommy, dad said it is bedtime." Rachel pouted

_How long have I been at it?_ She asked herself, looking at the clock. It was nearing 7:45 and she still had hours of work left.

"Ask House if he will put you to bed. I need to finish this tonight."

"No! I want you!" Rachel objected with a scowl as she stopped her foot and threw down her makeshift drumsticks.

"Rachel, you know better than to act like that! That isn't how you get what you want."

Tears welled up in her daughter's eyes, "I want you!" she cried earnestly.

Other than dinner, Cuddy hadn't spent much time with Rachel that day. Besides the weekend, the past week she had been deprived of much of her mother's attention.

With a sigh, she surrendered, "Alright."

Cuddy got Rachel ready for bed without a fight, which was unusual for her. Rachel's agreeableness lasted until it was time for her mother to leave her to fall asleep.

"Another story!"

"No, you know the rules, one story a night."

"I'm not tired. Can I have some juice?"

"No, you already brushed your teeth."

"Can I have some water?"

"No, you just had a glass."

"Can I go say goodnight to dad?"

How could she say no to that? "I'll get him." She stepped out, into the hall and called for House.

"What do you want, squirt? I was in the middle of my show?" He asked straight-faced, but with a light tone.

She showed him her puppy dog eyes, "I want a hug." With her arms outstretched towards him.

"I don't do hugs."

"Yes, you do! You hug all the time!" Her temper was beginning to flounder, as a result, her tone sharpened. Cuddy stood ready for him to provoke her into a complete meltdown, but she was pleasantly surprised.

He leaned down to her level and wrapped her in a hug. "That's supposed to be our secret."

"I'll see you in the morning?" she asked.

It was all very unlike her. She was normally a happy and agreeable child. But since the beginning of last week, the seriousness on her face had grown, as had her attention-seeking behavior. It was House, Cuddy was sure of it, his absence had frightened her. _Can I trust him to be there in the morning? _Rachel was finally satisfied and allowed their exit.

"You know, we could go to bed too." He gave Cuddy a pinch on her rump.

"No, I have to finish this." The bitterness of her response bothered him.

"You can pour over those numbers all you want, but there will always be variables that you haven't accounted for."

"Right, like you leaving us in the middle of the night." She bit back in a brisk pace down the hall.

He rolled his eyes. Her excuse for not going to bed wasn't just about finishing the papers, it was about ignoring him. "What? I'm not going to leave you."

"You did last week."

"I thought we talked about that already. I just needed air. It won't happen again."

"Didn't you hear her? She asked you if you would be here when she woke up."

"When I told her I would, she asked if you would be there too. Did _you_ not hear her?" His tone was sharp. "I might have left, but at least I spend time with her when I'm here." His voice was bitter and abrasive…but he was right. He was always right and she knew it.

-Huddy-

Cuddy sat outside Dr. Kraydel's office, with her phone to her ear. "Hey, where are you? It's time for our appointment."

"It's a simple procedure. You don't need me there. Kraydel has done this a thousand times and odds are, there's nothing wrong." His flippant tone set her temper ablaze.

"Damn it House, I just asked for you to be a normal boyfriend this one week."

"You've tried normal and you chose me." He joked and ended the call.

"Dr. Cuddy, the doctor is ready for you now." Called the nurse.

This wasn't starting the way she wanted. He was right, the odds were there was nothing to worry about, but if there was bad news…she didn't want to receive it alone. They were both past the prime age to be reproducing, although Cuddy shuttered to admit it. She was nearing menopause and not only was he into his fifties but he had abused drugs for well over a decade. Then there was the issue of her previous miscarriages and her troubles getting pregnant in the first place. The odds may be in their favor, but the odds against them were still far too high for her liking.

"Hello, Dr. Cuddy! Are you ready?" Dr. Kraydel asked as he entered. "I'm sure you are aware of how this procedure is performed."

_Wait, this is all too familiar, but maybe it's a coincidence or Deja-vu._ She nodded as he prepared the ultrasound machine and revealed her stomach. The machine came to life and the cold gel hit her skin. _This is all too much, if this was Deja-vu, it should have passed by now._

"How have you been feeling?" She heard, drawing her out of distress.

"Umm, I've been a bit anxious lately and some trouble sleeping. But I think it's due to the recent changes at work. My blood pressure was high some last week."

"Your blood pressure was perfect earlier. It may just be stress related but I would feel more comfortable if I wrote you a script for it. It also may be a good idea to begin to lighten your work schedule." There it was…the concerned look she had seen in her dream.

"What is it?" She uttered in a near whisper.

"Dr. Cuddy, it looks like here that the fetus has a cleft lip and palate." He indicated on the screen. "The amnio will tell us more."

"Is that all?" her voice was shaking now.

"That's all I see. The heartbeat sounds good. It's growing pretty well, other than the cleft." Her eyes began to soften. "Chances are that's all it is, it can be fixed with a few surgeries.

Tears streamed down her face. They began as tears of terror but ended as tears of celebration. It wasn't her nightmare realized, and everything looked like it was going to be alright. She couldn't tell House about her dream. He'd never believe her and she would never live it down. It was silly to be so worked up…but that didn't tame the fear that awaited the results of the amnio.

"Doctor, could you print the pictures of the cleft out for me, and a side profile. I need to show it to House."

-Huddy-

Walking back to her office, relief swept over her. Their child would be born with a malformation but it was nothing life-threatening or something that couldn't be fixed. A feeling of embarrassment filled her for letting something as silly as a hormonal nightmare get so worked up. She did, however, have another issue to deal with, House and his absence. Emotion after emotion swept over her, eventually settling on her usual steadfast confidence.

The halls were lined with whispering bodies; eyes leering at her as she strode the halls.

"Dr. House didn't even show up to his baby's appointment."

"Is he even the father?"

"If he is, they are going to have on hell of a time raising that spawn."

"I bet the kid has all sorts of problems. They are both older and House has done Lord knows what to his body."

Her confidence had switched to anger, or rather something closer to fury.

-Huddy-

House and his team returned to the DDX room. "Goff, get her file from my desk." She popped over to his office, taking longer than she should. "What's taking you so long?"

"I'm sorry." she returned holding a folder and four black photos. "I didn't know you got more pictures of little House!" She passed the photos off to Chase, who accepted them with excitement. House, on the other hand, was surprised, the sonograms hadn't been on his desk earlier.

"Give those to me!" He demanded but Chase smiled and passed them on to Taub and Foreman, who both rifled through them.

"Aw, it has a little bit of a cleft but that's repairable," Taub commented, handing the photos to his boss.

It was apparent to everyone in the room that House hadn't seen the photos yet, nor did he know about the cleft. He ripped the photos out of Taub's hand and studied them intently. _We'll have to check for PRS, Stickler syndrome, and 22q11 deletion syndrome._ "Review the file again, see if there is anything we've missed." He said rising to leave.

"Where are you going?" Taub shouted, but House had already left the room and was limping quickly down the hall.

"There he is." One nurse whispered

"Oh are those sonogram pictures he's carrying?" The two giggled together at the thought of House as a father.

Unlike most fathers he didn't seem happy, he wasn't happy. Their child had an issue and she didn't bother to let him know. His father's criticisms swam around his mind. _Poor kid will never fit in. You shouldn't have waited so long to have children Greg. See what your drug use did to your child. Your pride ruins everything you touch. He'll always be a freak._

_Damn it! He's wrong! Things like this happen. It will make her stronger; she'll have to rely on her own opinion of herself not the opinion of others. Who better to learn that from, than me and Cuddy? She…is it a girl? John would have wished for a grandson._ He continued his irregular gate with drive, to the woman who was sure to give him an earful.

-Huddy-

"Yes, set up a meeting sometime next week." She informed her assistant when he rounded the corner. "Come in, Dr. House."

"You didn't think I needed to know?" He accused, shaking the photos at her.

"Let's have this discussion in my office." She was calm and collected, ushering him in. "If you had bothered to show up to the appointment, then you would have found out with me." Her demeanor may have seemed calm; her voice was cold and professional, not the tone he usually received from her.

"I have a patient." It was a weak excuse. She shot back a derisive glare. "Okay fine, I deserved that."

"Why didn't you want to be there?" She demanded with a tinge of hurt on her face.

"It's stupid." "Okay, now that we've agreed on that. Why didn't you show up?"

"People get hurt when they get close to me."

"You thought that if you were there that we would get bad news...so you kept your distance for the sake of the child? What good did that do? Instead, I got to hear the bad news alone."

"As I said...it's stupid." "This pregnancy is making us both crazy. Last night I dreamed it had trisomy 13. The appointment today started just like my dream and I was worried it was a premonition."

He scoffed, limped closer to her and wrapped her in his arms. "You're right, this pregnancy is making us crazy."

Shortly after, a knock on the door sounded, it was Foreman arriving for the hospital's final offer.

"Come in," Cuddy called from her desk. "I'll see you later House."

"This is my business too."

Foreman scoffed "Hardly, I'm sure you will get the full story later. Beat it."

"You're not my boss yet, looks like he wants to be. Good news for the hospital." He left giving Cuddy two thumbs up, causing Foreman to sigh and roll his eyes.


	8. Tear Up My Reputation

**Chapter 8: ****Tear Up My Reputation**

A/N: Song for this chapter is "There's Nothing Holdin' Me Back" by Shawn Mendes. I really hope you all enjoy this chapter. I have been very excited about writing it! There is a lot in this chapter and hopefully House isn't too OOC. I try to base the character's reactions on similar instances from the show. Get your sweet tooth ready!

-Huddy-

The morning hadn't begun the way she had wanted. The house was an absolute mess: dishes in the sink, toys on the floor, laundry hampers full, the table cluttered. Her mother and sister were arriving for dinner that evening so they could announce her pregnancy and Rachel's adoption. Her alarm had turned off sometime during the night so she was running late. She supposed she had House to thank for that.

The tight clothes she had dawned most of her career served her well but were turning out to be less than helpful these days. She had to scour her closet for a clean outfit that fit. There was so much to do before the dinner and still so much to do before she even began work. She had on a black pencil skirt and a grey camisole. She felt arms wrap around her from behind, and warm lips pressed to her neck.

"I don't have time for this. Get off."

"Did we sleep in?" he teased, still holding her.

"You turned my alarm off." "You always wake up before your alarm. You obviously needed the extra rest." He was unapologetic, as he finally released her from his grasp.

"I have so much to do today. It was not the day to run this little experiment."

"You needed the rest; especially before dealing with the evil witch of the west tonight. I'll get Rachel up."

He was right. She felt more rested with the extra hour of sleep. She skipped yoga and House was dealing with Rachel; she might be able to still make it in on time. Allowing a soothing breath, she slowed her routine closer to its usual speed. She could hear House's deep voice from Rachel's room. When she peeked down the hall, she found him carrying her to the kitchen.

"You don't have to carry her."

"She's 30 pounds…I'm fine." It wasn't long until she heard screaming coming from the kitchen. "I don't want fruit! I want cereal!"

"Fruit is better for you." Rachel didn't seem convinced. "It'll make your hair pretty."

Cuddy donned her blouse; figuring he would soon need help. Rachel was trying to run her fingers through her hair when House served her a small bowl of fresh fruit. The poor girl's hair was a matted mess that she couldn't push her fingers through. Red flushed up the child's face as she lost her temper and began to pull violently at the tangles.

"No, it won't! It's just a big mouse hole!" Rachel flopped herself off the chair onto her knees. House was at a loss, it was just fruit…and the kid knew they could get the knot out. Cuddy was caught between laughing at Rachel's misphrasing of "rat's nest" and planting the child in time-out. She managed a third option and crouched down beside the child.

"What's wrong, Rachel? Did you not sleep well?" Rachel shook her head and huffed through more tears. "I'll get those tangles out before I leave don't worry. Eat some fruit and you'll feel better."

The morning's tragedy was resolved and she hoped the rest of it would remain peaceful, without her morning yoga, patience was in short supply. It was then she watched a strawberry fly across the room. _Take a deep breath Lisa…you can do this._ Her head was pounding and her heart raced with anger.

Rachel rarely lost her temper like this, although it had been happening more lately. _Lisa isn't going to be able to handle it this morning. Her blood pressure is probably already elevated._ He watched her hand rest on her forehead, massaging her temples, and then run down her face to her chest, to calm her racing pulse. He bent over to meet Rachel face-to-face,

"You will not act like that. You have to use words to tell us what's wrong. If you want us to fix it." His tone was stern, his eyes serious.

"My tummy hurts and I'm tired. I don't want mommy to leave!" She finally choked out.

"Your mom will be home tonight in time for dinner. Your Gigi and Aunt Julia are coming." He couldn't care less about the two visiting. No, he did care but it was because he would rather not fight the Jewesses. Rachel, on the other hand, loved them.

"That's forever from now! I never get to see mommy! She's always gone!" Rachel stomped her feet and crossed her arms.

"I know sweetheart but I have a hospital to run. But do you know what?"

"What? I'm getting some help. I'll get to be home with you more often." Cuddy assured her and gently tapped her on the nose, inducing the first smile of the morning.

The child's attitude broke enough for them to take her temperature. As it turned out, she didn't have a fever. After finishing her bowl of fruit, Cuddy sat behind her daughter and picked at the mess of tangles in the girl's delicate hair.

"Ow, mommy!" Rachel screamed

"Hold still." Rachel continued to wiggle and squirm until Cuddy couldn't handle it anymore.

"I don't have time for your mad fits this morning Rachel! You can go to preschool with tangled hair." Cuddy threw down the comb, throwing a bit of a fit herself.

Rachel cried and pleaded for her to come back. Large blubbering tears streamed down the child's face and her voice was coarse from weeping. Cuddy continued to gather her things and head for the door.

"Lisa" He urged sternly. She shouldn't leave angry at her child, who was obviously distressed. Surrendering with a sigh, she bent to meet her child's face.

"Rachel, mommy loves you and I'll be back in just a few hours."

"But my hair?" "House can get the tangles out, but I really must be going." She kissed Rachel who knelt on the floor and House, who stood with concern plastered on his face.

-Huddy-

Wilson approached the clinic reception desk, where Cuddy was reviewing a file. "Rough morning?" He flashed her a bright charming smile, picking up his next patient file.

"Yeah, dinner with my family tonight. But Foreman accepted the hospital's proposal so that's one less thing to worry about."

"What about your ultrasound earlier this week? I heard there were some issues?"

Wilson was always so thoughtful. His questions weren't like others from the hospital. They weren't to glean the latest juiciest gossip, but because he genuinely cared.

"House didn't show up but I guess I knew better than to expect him to."

He had to be cautious of how he handled his next question. "Word is you found something out about the fetus?"

She shot him a look of pure irritation. "Where did you hear that from? I'm sick of everyone around here poking their nose into our business. There are laws against sharing other people's medical information." She returned her gaze to the file in her hands. "Working around here you wouldn't know it."

"From House, he came and spoke with me." He lied. Adding more to her irritation wouldn't serve good for anyone.

"It has cleft lip and palate but we have to wait for the amnio tests to come back for any more news."

"Are you nervous?"

Shrugging her shoulders, she answered him with a nonchalant tone. "Chances are, everything will come back clear."

"You didn't answer my question."

"It's irrational to be nervous about it."

"But you are…and that's okay."

"I can't think about that today. We're announcing everything to my family tonight, over dinner." She regarded him hopefully.

"Nope, last time I had dinner with House and your mother, I ended up unconscious." You two will have to do this on your own. I expect your sister will be there too? She can quell your mother's attitude."

-Huddy-

She returned home after work and could smell food cooking in the kitchen. Finding dinner had already been started and someone had cleaned the house, she was relieved. Nerves from the amnio test remained, but this dinner was another huge hurdle. She wasn't even halfway through the race and she was already becoming exhausted. A rumble of small feet came racing to her from the kitchen. Rachel's fingers were covered in batter, from her hands slipping down the spoon as she stirred the cookie dough. Lisa swept her up into a hug and planted a kiss on the little girl's cheek.

"I'm making cookies for Gigi and Aunt Julia!" She bragged excitedly.

Lisa carried the girl back into the kitchen. "That's great, Rachel!" She put her down so she could continue with the cookies. "House, I didn't expect this. What did you do?" She said flirtatiously but then shot him a suspicious glare. Their shoulders touched and their eyes searched each other's.

"It got me out of the clinic."

She let out an exasperated sigh and rested her hands on her hips. "You didn't do clinic duty?"

"Would you have preferred to do all this yourself?"

How could she say yes to that? Cooking was never something she excelled at and it was quite sexy to watch him prepare dinner. "The house is spotless…when did you leave work?"

"I hired Breanna to come over and clean." She examined him incredulously. "She's a maid!" The look persisted. "She's not a prostitute!"

She elbowed him in the side. "Quiet!"

"Now, let me and my sous chef finish and go take a shower before the horde descends." He ordered with a kiss.

-Huddy-

Cuddy's calming shower was exactly what she needed, a moment to herself. Her muscles loosened under the warm water that washed away the drama of the day, and worries of the future. She knew they would soon all come flooding back but for now, she had peace. The door to the bathroom creaked open, making her jump.

"Are you sure you're only 15 weeks? Cause ooo those hips!" He said, peeking in the shower door and admiring her body. "The witches just called, they'll be here in twenty minutes or so."

Then returned the stress she felt before the shower. With those words, it entered through her ears and took over her senses. His hands grasped her sides as she stood in the spray of the shower. They shared a promising kiss when they heard Rachel's call.

"Dad, somethings beeping!"

"You better go." She whispered seductively, before kissing his ear.

"We'll finish this later." He ensured her and left with a kiss.

She didn't have much time left to relax. Cuddy had handled her mother's scrutiny her entire life. Today would be no different. The hope was that House didn't get too defensive or that Rachel wouldn't get caught in a family argument.

"Did you help momma dry off?" She heard a small muffled voice ask from the kitchen.

Her life had become a dream: a career she enjoyed, a man she loved with a child and one on the way. Sure there was still drama, but how many times had she wished to share a family with the man she loved? How many times had she thought of how a relationship with him would play out? This is the culmination of decades of dreams. Feeling strong and energized again, the mountain before her seemed possible and she wouldn't let anything stop her.

-Huddy-

The doorbell rang and Cuddy took a deep breath before facing the battle that was sure to ensue. It's not that she didn't want to see them, it was she knew it would end in a fight or drama of some sort. She wore a steel blue knit short-sleeved shirt that clung loosely to her abdomen and a pair of black pixie cut pants with black ballet flats. She opened the door with a toothy smile.

A frenzy of greetings commenced. Rachel came running, her hands still wet from helping in the kitchen. The three generations of Jewish women all fawned over the reunion. House had stayed out of their way, standing a few feet in the distance, observing the scene.

"Oh, Lisa you must be in such bliss," Arlene said as she warmly embraced her daughter.

_Thank God, a kind word from that woman._

"You know what they say when people find love. They're fat and happy." Her mother shot a judgmental glance at her growing belly.

_There, it's gone. Why do I let myself hope she might approve._

"That shirt does nothing to hide that pudge you've gotten." Her mother noted flippantly, moving along to hug her granddaughter.

She was an expert at that, saying something so crude and blunt that it took Lisa by surprise. House was unamused at the comment. His lips tightly pressed together, keeping in his desired retort. Her mother was not one to talk about letting themselves go. Most women younger than her couldn't hold a candle to Lisa's looks, let alone those her age. Even Julia was amazed that her mom had gone there so quickly.

"You look great, as always Lis," Julia said, hugging her sister.

Arlene had scooped Rachel into her arms and was admiring her locket. Rachel still hadn't let them take it to get the engraving fixed. She kept it around her neck every second she could.

"Lisa, a silver locket for a four-year-old is-" she stopped when she saw the letters engraved on the back. "Is there something you need to tell us?"

"We'll tell you over dinner."

"You should tell me now," Arlene demanded, putting the child back down.

"I'm adopting Rachel." House spat with confidence, stepping closer, joining the group of women.

"He's going to be my daddy! And I'm going to be a big sister!" Rachel shouted with excitement.

"Dang sis…when you say you have an announcement…you really have an announcement!" Julia was appalled but excited. "Congratulations!" The sisters and Rachel started another round of hugs, which much to House's chagrin, included him this time. Several moments pass as they waited for Arlene's response

"If you haven't gathered that's the reason for the pooch," House said bitterly, gesturing to Lisa's baby bump. "Nothing to say, Arlene?"

"I'm waiting for you to tell me when you're marrying my daughter." She bit back.

"Come on mom! It's the twenty-first century, we don't have to get married!"

"Well, I don't suppose you have told his parents?" Arlene asked bitterly

"His mother's coming for the adoption proceedings towards the end of next month."

The look Arlene shown was fierce enough to stop an experienced soldier in his tracks.

"Smells like the food is ready mom… Why don't we eat?" Julia suggests after seeing the heat that had boiled up in her sister's face.

-Huddy-

"Lisa, this is very good. I didn't know you could cook this well." Her mother bragged.

"Actually, House made it," Cuddy admitted

"And I helped!" Rachel added, bouncing in her chair.

"I'm sure you did, sweetheart. Lisa, if the two of you are starting a family together, why do you still call him by House? It's a little weird."

"Mom, I've known him as House for over two decades and he still works for me. It's a bit of a habit."

"About that…Why did you wait this long? Don't you think you're both a little old to be adding to the family?" Her mother stated, cutting into her lamb.

"I'm obviously not." She responded, gesturing to her pregnant belly.

"I mean honey, you're 43 and he's got to be in his fifties. By the time the kid is out of school, he'll be approaching the end of his life expectancy."

"What does life espestancy mean?" Rachel inquired of House.

"It means-"

"Mom, that's enough." Julia interrupted.

"Julia, she is an inquisitive child, she needs to know the meaning of words."

"She doesn't need to understand that, just yet!" House's tone was firm as his blue eyes glared into hers.

"You have yet to say one positive thing the entire time you've been here. You can shut the... you can be positive or you can leave." Lisa had had enough.

"She can't leave before my cookies!" Rachel whined, her voice weak and timid from the hostility circulating the room.

"Then I guess she'll just have to learn to mime her insults." House retorted, taking Rachel by the hand to retrieve the cookies from the kitchen.

-Huddy-

"These are good Rachel!" Julia said taking another bite of her sugar cookie with blue icing and pink sprinkles.

"What do you say, Rach?" Cuddy nudged.

"Thank you! We don't know if I'm going to have a brother or a sister so the blue is for a little brother and the sprinkles are for a little sister!"

"How far along are you? When is your due date?" Inquired Julia, excitedly.

"16 weeks, we're due in January. "

"That's far too close to Christmas. Everyone will forget it's birthday."

House's face stiffened and rage stormed in his eyes, you could almost see steam exiting his ears.

"Mommy, what does she mean forget it's birthday? My birthday is close to Christmas…" Tears welled up in Rachel's eyes

"See what I mean?" Arlene continued.

"Why can't you just be happy for us?" Lisa barked as Rachel's pleading eyes bore at her.

"Be proud of my nafka of a daughter? You are having a child out of wedlock and selling off your adopted one. You have to protect yourself, Lisa. What if this man decides to run off?"

House slammed his hand on the table. "Arlene, that's not going to happen."

"Why not? You've left before! Don't think Julia didn't tell me!"

A silence fell over the room before it was finally broken by Rachel. "What does she mean momma?"

"Rachel, we'll talk about it over bedtime. Go hug Julia goodnight."

"But mommy, what about what Gigi said?" Tears flowed freely from the child's eyes as she gasped for air.

"I said we'll talk about it over bedtime." Lisa ensured the girl, holding out her hand for her to take and shooting House a 'take care of this' gaze.

-Huddy-

"Is your problem with me or Lisa?"

"Lisa has her own way of doing things but they are successful. I don't know about you, but don't you dare hurt them!" Arlene threatened, pointing a finger at him.

"Me? I think you've done an excellent job of that yourself!" He yelled back.

Julie stood, ready as a potential mediator.

"Why did you leave?"

"It's none of your damn business. But if you're curious I'm sure Julia can tell you that too!" He shot Julia a glare that made her want to shrink away into the wall. The expectant glare continued…she wasn't going to get out of this.

"Lisa said he was worried about his ability to parent."

"Oh, how virtuous of you! You're confident in that ability now? What changed?" The space between the matriarch and diagnostician was closing.

His face dropped, breaking eye contact with his accuser. "I have to try, despite what my rational mind is telling me. I want this."

"So you think raising children with my daughter is irrational? You've already given up?" Arlene was hot with fury, her voice booming through the house.

"No, I figured that if crazy bitches like you can raise someone like Lisa, that I might as well give it a chance. If there is anyone that I trust to contain and negotiate with my neurosis, it is Lisa."

For the first time since the pregnancy announcement the bitter scowl on Arlene's face faded. "Then why not marry her?"

"She doesn't need a male to protect her. She is perfectly capable of that herself."

"And what do you think she left you in here to do? Your hackles raised every time I opened my mouth. Then she looked to you to handle her out of control mother. What's your next excuse."

"You sly dog. Is that what all this was about? It was all a test?"

Arlene shrugged her shoulders and allowed a small grin to pass her lips. "It's every girl's dream to be married with children. And every parent's job to inspect the man she brings home."

"Cuddy isn't your average woman."

"People want to believe they're special, but they aren't. Just last year she was engaged to a man she didn't even love…" Arlene's face was almost kind but her words were unequivocal. She had rendered the room silent. Julia dared not breathe.

He turns his face in defeat. "She has enough to worry about, without planning a wedding." His quiet confession trailed off into nearly a whisper, as they heard Lisa's footsteps approaching from down the hall.

The room was filled with an odd tension, not quite resembling the fury she had left them in but not yet peaceful either. "Did we work things out?" Lisa asked suspiciously, attempting to read the faces around the room.

"Yes, I think we did." Her mother answered, sporting a triumphant grin.

"That's…good…" Lisa peered back at House who stared back at her intently, affirming her mother's claim. "She wants to see you before she goes to sleep."

His sarcastic demeanor returned. "Children are so needy!"

Arlene and Julia gathered their things, as House made his way to Rachel. "It's time for us to head home anyway. Take care of yourself. Enjoy your body now because it won't ever be the same, Lisa."

-Huddy-

They washed and dried the dishes together. Lisa knew something happened while she was out of the kitchen, something significant. "What did my mother and you talk about?"

"She was just testing to see if I was worthy of her little princess." That wasn't the whole truth and she knew it.

"Yeah? Did you pass?"

"Seems like it."

"What did you really talk about?"

"Just what I said, it was a test."

"I'll just ask Julia."

"You can but I don't think she will tell you any more than I did." His brows furrowed, his posture was rigid. It was obvious he was thinking about something, but she knew getting it out of him would be nearly impossible. "Rachel was pretty shaken up. What did you tell her?"

"I told her you were scared when you found out about the baby and that you were here to stay now."

The house was somber. They didn't know which they would rather have…somber or furious. After all, those were the only two results they expected after a dinner with her mother.

"She was still crying when I left. Nothing I did helped." He admitted sullenly.

Cuddy dried the dishwater from her hand, turned to him, and grabbed his shoulders.

"It's okay, you tried and that's what matters. We're both glad you're here now. It was responsible to take time to think it over. Don't blame yourself."

He could do nothing but nod, hoping she was right.

-Huddy-

Their bedroom door squeaked open in the middle of the night, waking them. A small shadow was outlined by the dim nightlight in the hall.

"I can't sleep. Can I sleep with you?" Her voice seemed impossibly small.

"Honey, you know what we said about sleeping in-"

"Come on, Rach" He beckoned, patting the blanket next to him.

"Greg" She began sternly, when Rachel leaped on the bed, in between them.

"Lisa, you know you could use it too."

It was the first time that the three of them would share this innocent family comfort. Rachel burrowed under the blankets between the couple, buried her face under her mother's chin, and wrapped her arms around her. They all got a peaceful night's sleep.


	9. Let Them Talk

**Chapter 9: Let Them Talk**

A/N: I name every chapter after a lyric in a song. Usually I don't expect you all to listen to them but this time it will really add something to the story. "Let Them Talk" performed by Hugh Laurie, he does a beautiful job performing it. It can be heard on his album or, if you want video too (which I suggest, he is very expressive) search "Hugh Laurie Let Then Talk legendado Br", Daniel Santos posted a good cut from the live performance, on YouTube. I hope you enjoy and as always thank you for the reviews!

-Huddy-

In the conference room, Foreman and Cuddy sat side-by-side reviewing talking points for the board meeting. The board members began to arrive, filling the seats one by one, each of them examining Foreman as they waited. He was fairly young for the position and had worked for a maverick Doctor for nearly a decade. Did he still hold the strict moral lawfulness that was expected by a Doctor? Word had it that during his brief employment outside of PPTH that he was terminated for following a similar protocol as the notorious Dr. House. Were they promoting someone who would keep House firmly under his thumb or would he be a diseased branch to spread rebellion throughout the remainder of the hospital?

Cuddy rose and the whispers around the table quieted. "Hello, shall we begin with some old business. Foreman has accepted the hospital's offer of promotion to assistant dean of medicine and a twenty-five percent raise."

A few grumbles sounded from the board but most insisted they were glad to welcome Dr. Foreman to the team. Others commented they were thankful that Cuddy was allowing herself more time for her family and personal life.

She felt personally responsible for the hospital's inconvenience. Over the years she had gotten in the habit of sacrificing anything she had for the good of the hospital. This was one of the few times she had done something for herself despite what it may cost her work. She didn't regret her decision, but that didn't mean she didn't feel guilty for the trouble caused. Creating the position meant budget cuts for other parts of the hospital, which meant patients and doctors were going without. Instead of the money being spent on patient care, it would be spent to accommodate her personal life choices.

"Dr. Cuddy, Is it true that Mr. Turner and Mr. Wallace have both recently discontinued their donations to the hospital?" Dr. Simmons, who had shown his opposition to the creation of the new position inquired.

"For the time being, yes. I don't see that being a continuing issue, however."

"Why is that? Did they present the reason as to why they were discontinuing their support?"

"They are concerned about the recent budget changes, due to the addition of Dr. Foreman's position. I ensured him that the dispersion of responsibility would ensure that there were ample attention and time to be given in any area that may demand it."

Simmons gave a grim and arrogant smile. "You seem very confident they will continue their support in the future. Do you see Foreman's position as purely temporary?"

She knew what he was getting at…if Foreman's position was temporary then so was her relationship with House or his employment at the hospital.

"No, this is the way it needs to be, for the sake of continued growth here. Mr. Turner and Mr. Wallace value the work of this hospital and are smart businessmen. They are looking out for their investments. Once they see progress being made, after the addition of Dr. Foreman, I believe they will continue their donations."

A few other members voiced their support of the addition, which calmed Cuddy's guilt on the matter. _'You aren't superhuman.' 'Nobody can do what you do and have a family.'_ The criticisms she had heard over the last few months rang through her mind. _This is what's best for the health of the hospital. If I kept going like I was and pushing myself to the max, I would have burnt out, is no help to the hospital or Rachel._

"I assume we plan on remodeling your office to accommodate the two of you?" Another member inquired.

"Yes, Dr. Foreman and I have been reviewing plans for that and we hope to see it completed within the next couple weeks."

The remainder of the meeting went as usual: small complaints here and there, HR complaints, and other issues. Cuddy was glad that part of these meetings would soon fall to Foreman, but then again another part of her wanted to keep the entire contents of the cookie jar as her own.

-Huddy-

"I can't help the moron if he thinks the only way he can lose weight is by gnawing on cotton balls dipped in juices," House said in Wilson's office with an arm propped on the back of the couch and his legs laying across the other cushions.

"Yes, but yelling that at him while his business partners stood right outside the door wasn't the way to tell him." Wilson's desk was piled with papers, which he busily rifled through.

"He obstructed his intestinal tract with bits of cotton and I'm the one who acted irrationally?"

"He's suing you for violating HIPAA and defamation. Not that you would worry about it but he doesn't have a case."

House gave a frustrated sigh. "Cuddy isn't going to like it."

"Don't you mean Foreman? He's your boss now."

"No, Foreman knows they don't have a case. Cuddy has been on edge since she announced her pregnancy to the hospital."

"I've noticed. She was tense at the board meeting this morning. She's too hard on herself. She wouldn't expect us to abandon her family for this job and we don't expect it from her."

"Some people do." Worry lines framed his eyes as he massaged his scarred leg.

"It would help if you could behave. The staff is angry that you might get away with even more than you do."

"But Oprah tells me that I need to find a woman who will accept me for who I am." House patronized, feigning an innocent look.

Wilson let out an annoyed breath and directed his gaze to his friend. "How is the pregnancy going? I heard about the clefts. How are you two handling that?"

"What's to handle? There's nothing to handle until it's born."

"It's your child, surely you care? When are you going to find out the gender? I'm tired of you calling it an it."

"As soon as I see the amnio results have come in."

His friend obviously had no intention of waiting for the doctor's appointment. No doubt he would steal the results from records. "Humanoid couples usually find out together."

"I have come to this planet to form a new and better race."

Wilson rolls his eyes. "Don't you think that Cuddy may want to share the experience with you?"

There had been too many of these emotional moments for him recently. He had been numb for years and was accustomed to the lack of emotion, negative or otherwise. So often in his life, when he got close to anyone, they used their proximity to break him. It was a vulnerability that he was practiced in protecting at all costs. Now that he had the opportunity to share such intimate and joyous events with someone, he was becoming overwhelmed.

_Lisa is much too stressed. How much of her stress is due to my inability to open myself up to her? Is that still something that I am capable of? No matter what my feelings on the matter...she needs to have a healthy pregnancy._

-Huddy-

"You make one mistake around here and you're fired. Unless you are House and are fucking the boss, then you can get away with murder!" Nurse Linda yelled furiously from the middle of the lobby

House had just stepped out of the elevator when he heard the commotion.

"Guard Phillips, will you escort Ms. Garfield out. She can call back at a later time to gather her things with an escort." The dean instructed tensely, as she tried to hold it together. She reentered her office, with her head bowed and her body dragging along tiredly.

House let himself into her office and found her eyes rimmed in red, looking solemnly at her phone.

"You saw that I suppose?"

"Saw what?" He asked, grabbing the phone out of her hand. The screen displayed a shot of him and Rachel the morning after dinner with the Cuddy women. The morning light was just beginning to shine through the window, the room filled with a warm glow. Rachel's head rested on his chest, one arm wrapped around his body, and her legs tucked up by her stomach. He held her protectively in his arms, his chin resting on the crown of her head. This time two years ago he wouldn't have believed it. He wasn't one to comfort or to seek comfort in others. Something had changed…or at least…something had been revealed within him that he didn't know he still possessed.

"Don't delete it." Cuddy quietly pleaded, drawing him out of his reverie.

"What?" Her eyes were hesitant and worrisome. She knew he hated pictures being taken of him and how he valued his reputation.

He returned the phone to her. "They wouldn't believe it if they saw it."

"Which one of your spies told you about Nurse Linda?" Her expression was dejected.

"The team was gossiping about it when I got back from lunch." He picked up a small sculpture from her desk and fiddled with it in his hands. "You don't regret this do you?"

"No! But I can't help but feel guilty of some of their accusations. I've always been easier on you... I'm sacrificing part of the hospital for my personal interest…"

"That's what I'm talking about!" He nearly shouted. Her shocked and questioning look indicated she hadn't followed. "You shouldn't be so hard on yourself. You deserve a full life and you need to think about the fetus. This much stress isn't healthy."

She was furious. How dare he lecture her over a lack of concern over their child. Where was he when all this began? She was doing all of this for them…for the child. She didn't regret this pregnancy, their relationship, this new life they were embarking on. "I am thinking about the child. But that doesn't mean I can't do my job."

"I didn't say you couldn't. Your job doesn't make you happy. It makes you feel useful. You need to get over what the morons here might think."

Still furious, she could only nod in agreement. He was right, the stress wasn't good for her pregnancy and this job would never care for her in return. She had to choose something that would. She simply hoped she could continue to feel useful. As several moments of silence passed, House rubbed his leg, hoping to relieve the tension that was building throughout his body.

"When were you planning on finding out the sex of the fetus?" He asked, eyes averted across the room, not meeting her's.

"I figured when the amnio results came back. Even though we can't prepare the nursery until we find a house, I'd still like to know. We're so far behind."

He watched her tiredly run her hand over her forehead and through her hair. _The pregnancy has taken a lot out of her. Maybe it's the stress…it had to be the stress. The second trimester is usually when most women are more energized, but her energy and nerves have gotten worse. What am I going to do? If she wasn't going to watch out for her health…then I have to._

"You're still thinking about those gossiping morons around the hospital."

"What do you expect me to do? Unlike you, my job depends on my reputation and it's being torn apart."

She had spent more time in her office since their announcement, calling employees to her office instead of going confronting them in their own.

"Damn it, Lisa!" He pounded his fist on her desk. "No! Come here." He rose, snatched her wrist and drug her out of the office to the lecture hall.

-Huddy-

She sat in the closest seat to the piano, which stood hidden in the corner of the room. His fingers drifted mindlessly over the keys of the forgotten instrument. What are we doing here, she pondered. Rarely had she gotten to hear him play the piano. His guitar had rang rock ballads through the halls a few times throughout the years. but the piano was when he opened his soul. It wasn't about the memories of a teenaged concert or the lyrics that were sung. At the piano, beauty poured out. He was talented at guitar, but he was an artist when he sat at the piano.

"You know Lisa, you can stop the talk anytime you want. You're in control just as much now as you always were."

A warm steady blues tune began to emerge. It transported them to a dimly lit, intimate barroom, from the harshly bright empty classroom. His eyes closed as his fingers danced through the notes. His heart led them, leaving his mind to withdraw into the background. The music was beautiful and calmed her soul. When he opened his mouth to sing, his voice was mellow and deep. His vocalizing wasn't flashy or elaborate. but earnest and true.

"_Just let them talk, If they want to._

_Talk don't bother me. I'm gonna keep on till the whole wide world knows,_

_That I really love you, I really love you so."_

She sat there in awe. Her heart fluttered and a chill rushed up her spine. He had never been one to declare love or reveal his true feelings to anyone, but there he sat…bearing his heart to her. Surely his baritone voice could be heard beyond the doors, in the busy lobby. Because of his concern for me, he is bearing it all.

"_And let them whisper for they know not_

_What's between you and I'm gonna keep on, I'm gonna keep on loving you._

_Till the day that I die." _

The low pulse of the music tugged at her heart. The distance she had created between them because of her senseless worry, seemed to magnify the space that separated them, although they sat but a few feet apart. She felt the need to run to him from across the wide expanse, but she didn't dare move and interrupt the flow from his soul to hers. A pain-filled her heart. _Why have I allowed those voices to dictate how I feel about my growing family?_

"_They'll try to break up our romance,_

_They didn't stand a chance. We have the kind of love that's so strong,_

_We'd be together from now on."_

The lyrics spoke to her deepest concerns. The voices that echo through the hospital, judging our love, don't have any power over us. Their love had endured decades of tension created purely from each other. It had survived horrible sins, addiction, pride, and it will survive this too. _What would I choose over him? What could I choose over him? …next to nothing. He is brash and arrogant, but his scarred soul was kind._

People began to mingle by the doors, peering in at the oblivious couple inside. The soulful ballad broke their hateful hearts. He might have been an ass and a drug addict but there was no doubt that he loved her. Not one person could deny that, after listening to the conviction in his voice. That old grouch had found love, something to break through his barricade, to rediscover his humanity.

"What's going on?" Wilson asked Nurse Brenda, who was floating around the crowd gathering at the doors.

"That's Dr. House." His brows rose in surprise, pointing to the room.

She nodded. "He's good." A smile shone on her lips for her administrator and friend as she continued her rounds.

Wilson could hear the low tone of his friend's voice, as he pushed his way to the front of the crowd. _His team has to hear this. _He pulled out his cell phone as he wore a brimming smile.

"_They'll say that gossip comes from the devil's workshop,_

_And only true love can make it stop._

_I'm gonna keep on, I'm gonna keep on loving you!_

_Till the day that I die." _

Some men may hold their lover's hand or stroke their back in an attempt to calm them, but not him. He touched her soul with his music. The further into the piece he progressed the deeper his spirit dove, becoming lost and forgetting the rest of the world.

"_Oh they're envious, of everything that we do."_

His eyes opened and found her's; those blue eyes saw into her soul. The music diminished them to but mere spirits twirling around each other. Never before had she had such an intimate experience and never before had she felt such devotion. Her anxiety had dissolved away, never to be resumed.

"_But I wanna say it's wonderful"_

He was having fun and something akin to joy crossed his face as he lost himself more in her eyes.

"_When you love someone, And that someone yeah that someone really loves you."_

They shared a final glance as he rose from the bench. She finally closed the distance between them and enveloped him in her arms. "I love you. Thank you."

He nodded, excavating himself from their embrace when his mask returned. He wore it as to ward off others from getting close. Feeling the change in him, she turned to see the crowd peering in the doors and so she dawned her own mask.

The group thinned as they walked to the doors, workers returning to their duties. Much to House's displeasure, applause erupted and spread throughout the lobby as they exited.

"Yes, yes, back to work," Cuddy commanded the remaining onlookers, waving them on. Her usual confidence was back. As they went their separate ways, House retreating around the corner to the elevators and Cuddy to her office, several approached her commenting on the performance and others with hospital business.

-Huddy-

When he arrived at his office Foreman and his fellows erupted in excitement. "I demand you all bow to the king of romance." He pronounced, sitting at the head of the table.

"I, for one, am happy for you. I thought you'd do something to screw it up by now." Foreman said before returning to the file in front of him.

"You know if this is just a ploy, you won't survive it. Half the hospital would retaliate for you leading her on." Taub commented.

"Your confidence in me is overwhelming. Goff, why do you insist on that stupid grin every time something like this happens?"

"I'm happy for you." She jovially admitted, her bright smile still shining.

Taub looks to House. "Well, for your sake…I hope it lasts."

"There is always hope where real love exists." The room rolls their eyes at her level of optimism.

_Surely she knew better…surely she had better sense than to think nothing could go wrong? There were plenty of things that could go wrong: I could fall back into drugs, a life-threatening problem with the pregnancy or the novelty of the relationship wears off and it falls apart. But then she would probably argue that love is a verb, not an emotion._ "Thank you, Jennifer Haymore, but if you don't wipe that grin off your face I'll make you give the patient an enema."

-Huddy-

Cuddy finally had enough, after the show that House put on for her nothing was going to stand in her way. She sat at her computer and composed a hospital-wide email.

"In the past weeks, many of you have had things to say about my relationship with Dr. House. For those of you who have taken your time to address me privately and respectfully about concerns you had, thank you. If you have a problem or concern, present it to your supervisor and it will be handled from there.

To those of you who have decided to handle your concerns by way of gossip, shame on you. We are not going to better this hospital or improve our care for patients through hateful and presumptuous language. If your intention is to degrade the workings of this hospital then you are no longer welcome here. If I continue to see gossip interfering with work around the hospital, there will be disciplinary actions."

It was a short but forward email. That was the day the gossip slowed significantly…at least the negative gossip. Instead, the favorite topic of discussion was that House, the heartless bastard, was hopelessly in love and somehow she had found a way past his defenses.


	10. My Father's Eyes

**Chapter 10: My Father's Eyes**

A/N: I'm so glad you enjoyed last chapter! In this one we find out the gender of the "little cottage." Tell me what you think.

House sat uncomfortably in Dr. Nolan's office. Cuddy made it a point that he continue his visits, despite his seemingly substantial growth as of late.

"What's been going on this past week?"

"I just finished a case. It was a 6-year-old boy with nearly continual focal motor seizures."

Nolan raised his eyebrows surprised by the mundane case his patient had chosen to spend time treating.

"Well, I diagnose the undiagnosable. He came in with a pretty severe concussion from a fall during an episode."

*Flashback*

"Why are we taking this case anyway? The kid has severely worsening seizures and fell from the monkey bars while his mom wasn't watching. There's nothing we can do." Taub complained

"We've got to be able to find something that works." Goff beckoned, searching the chart.

Taub wasn't in the mood to argue, it had been a slow week. It could have been any number of things: tumor, stroke, infection, Rasmussen's, Bartonella, and Lyme. They gave him another MRI, which came back clean as it had for all the other doctors the kid had seen.

When House went to see the kid, he was playing a small toy guitar and his mother was weeping near his bed. Well, it was less like playing and more like strumming strings to form a tune. He had his head wrapped and dark bruises spotted his face. The mother was near hysterics, she needed to leave and compose herself. House told her to go get something to eat and take a break. His eyes followed her as she left. He worried about his mother's tears.

Mikey's seizures started a few months ago but since then they had tried every sort of anticonvulsant, not leaving them many options.

"Hey kid, you like playing the guitar?"

The kid nodded. "I'm playing a sad song."

House studied his vital monitor and the readouts of his EEG. "Sounds like it. Do you know any chords?"

He studied the frets, strings, and finger placement and managed a couple of them.

"A few more of those and you'll outdo Ryan Peake."

A smile stretched across the kid's lips that began to twitch and convulse. His condition had taken so much from him: his ability to play with other children, to go to school, speak with confidence, and now even walk straight. There were intelligent eyes behind it all; when he wasn't recovering from an episode.

"Let me see that thing." The kid handed it over, watched House sit next to him on the bed, and tuned the instrument. As close to in tune as one could expect from a toy anyway.

"What kind of music do you like?" He continued to fiddle with the guitar.

Mickey shrugged and tried to fight off the clouds that threatened to overtake his mind. "Metallica"

"I won't hold that against you. I'll have to come back and play some real music for you sometime." he strummed a few weak chords and returns the guitar. "Tell me; has your heartfelt funny lately? Any rashes or funny looking spots?"

The kid shook his head. "Well, we think you have Lyme disease so we're going to start you on doxycycline. It should make you feel better."

*End Flashback*

"The doxy didn't do any good. We thought he'd have to have a hemispherectomy but the mother approved the neuro-pace stimulator. It's not the standard treatment but it's shown promise."

Nolan looked at him curiously. It was unlike House to show open concern for the personal wellbeing of the patient. "That's good. There's a chance your team provided him with a shot at a full life."

House shrugged, not accepting the congratulations. There was something there but he could tell it was going to take some digging before the diagnostician would reveal what was troubling him. It was always more effective if he circled the issues a few times before House was ready to approach it directly.

"It seems that work is going well. You mentioned before that Dr. Cuddy's anxiety had reduced since that afternoon in the lecture hall. Are things still going well with her?"

House leaned back in his chair. "She's been looking at houses for sale."

*Flashback*

It was her nightly ritual as they lay in bed and wound down from the day. He read a medical journal and she searched through the website of local realty agencies. They had only briefly talked about what they wanted in a home. She insisted that it be one level, with the excuse that she didn't want the kids running up and down the stairs…but he knew that wasn't entirely the truth.

His leg had been bothering him more recently, as it always did at the change of the seasons. House wanted a study and a place for his baby grand piano. Other than the one brief discussion, she had done most of the work herself. Night after night she sat swiping through pictures of house after house, saving some and sneering at others. Sometimes he caught her sighing at the beauty of one and glumly swiping past it.

*End Flashback*

"She's going to have to make a decision soon." House was leaning forward, his eyes drifted into the distance.

"Maybe it would be best to wait until after the baby's born."

He threw up his arms in defense. He had tried talking some sense into that woman but once she got her mind on something it was like treating cancer, you just wait and hope things work out before everything collapses. She has a strong immunity to stressful situations but it often leads to her pushing herself to the brink.

"It seems like you're worried about how hard she's working?"

"She wouldn't be Cuddy if she didn't." He sat back with an amused scoff. "The other day she had dinner with some high roller who she's been trying to swindle money from for years."

*Flashback*

Cuddy arrived at the local restaurant in a slim-fitting black business dress. Her growing bump was obvious but added beautifully to her curves. She was there to meet with Mr. Jonathan Johannes, or Jo as his partners call him. _He was late, of course. As most arrogant businessmen, they assume their time is more valuable than my own. It's not like I have a family to get back home to or that I am starving and would like to order my food._

He finally marched in, donning a pinstriped suit that coordinated with his dark grey hair. The man was a relic from a previous generation, in both age and values. He waved at several tables of diners on his way through the restaurant. _This is going to be a long night._

"Hello Ms. Cuddy, it's nice to meet with you." His smile was bright but not a flicker of mutual respect did it shine. It was the smile that an experienced professional may pander to a novice, to encourage their endeavors. The meeting itself was his way of generosity. He didn't plan on any money leaving his pocket that night.

"It's Dr. Cuddy actually. Thank you for meeting with me." It was a game she was used to playing; lure them in with kindness and then strike hard, like an anglerfish dangling its luminescent bulb for its prey.

"Yes of course." They both took their seats. "What can I do for you today, Dr. Cuddy."

"I figured we could discuss that after we ordered our meal."

"Oh, I won't be staying that long. I thought we might have a couple of drinks and both be on our way. But, considering your condition, maybe not."

Should I lie and make him feel terrible for assuming that I'm pregnant? "You go right ahead and enjoy your drinks. I'm happy with my lemon water." And some of their vegetarian lasagna but looks like that isn't going to happen.

"If you insist." He raised his hand for the waitress and proceeded to order himself a drink. "Congratulations, by the way, I'm sure your husband's very happy."

"Oh we aren't married but yes we are both quite happy about it. I've heard that you have four children of your own."

"Yes, the oldest is in his 40's and the youngest just started his freshman year at Columbia."

"That's a good school. I also heard that one of them suffers from the effects of DiGeorge Syndrome?"

"Yes, my second wife's daughter, Clara. She would've been beautiful." He doesn't bat an eye and continues to flip through their drink menu.

_Would have been?_ She was shocked, how could she have overlooked that? "I'm sorry, did she pass?"

"No, she lives with her mother in the city." Again he showed not a glimmer of love or revelry towards his daughter that lived with his estranged ex-wife.

_She would have been beautiful…that bastard._

"Since you are so personally familiar with someone who suffers from an immunological disorder, I thought you might be interested to hear that our hospital employs one of the world's best doctors who specializes in the field."

"Oh, really? Is he doing research on DiGeorge?"

"No, but our hospital does have a department that specializes in disorders which are rare and oftentimes life-threatening."

"That's nice." He dismissed, stirring his drink mindlessly. "Do you plan on staying home with the baby after you give birth?"

"With all due respect, Mr. Johannes that's none of your concern."

"A child needs its mother. A mother shouldn't abandon their child for the pursuit of an ill-fated career."

"Listen, Jo, that's enough! I've been of great service to our hospital since my appointment as dean of medicine, well over a decade ago. You don't know anything about my career nor the love I have for my family. I'm afraid I have wasted my time with you. Goodnight." She rose, grabbed her clutch, and left.

*End Flashback*

"When she got home she was furious. Unlike with the gossip at the hospital, there wasn't a doubt in her mind that she'd get everything she wanted, with him on board or not." House finished with a ghost of a smile and admiration shining in his eyes.

"That's good. It seems like you've helped her find her self-confidence again. What about you? How are you handling the pregnancy and impending amnio results?"

House's entire demeanor changed for just a moment before he caught himself. His jaw clenched, his posture closed, and the spark in his eyes smoldered into concern.

"It's been fine. I haven't been filling my every moment with work, like Cuddy. I went bowling with Wilson and Chase last night."

"How was that?"

"Good, some menacing child came running down the lane next to us, fell and started screaming. Chase found the kid's mom. She exchanged her number for the kid."

"That is the second instance you've brought up a child. First, you're working extra hours with a young patient and now, instead of telling me about the bowling score or some joke, you focused on a child that Chase helped. Why is that?"

"I don't have much to say. That was the only thing that was out of the ordinary about our game. I've told you about our games before. There's nothing special there."

"But there is something special with children. I noticed you tensed briefly when I asked how you were handling the pregnancy. Is there something troubling you there?" There it was again, House adjusted in his seat and his body tensed.

"I'm not the one that's pregnant." His tone bordered on defensive.

"But the more the pregnancy progresses the closer you are to being a father." Nolan's eyes were soft but imploring.

"I already have a kid. At least that's what she calls me."

"That one isn't yours biologically or legally. Either way, you will be responsible for three lives, rather than just your own. That doesn't worry you?"

House's anxiety faded and was replaced with determination, when he looked Nolan straight in the eye, pulled a packet of papers out of his backpack, and plopped them on his desk.

"The amnio results, I suppose the results came back clear or you would have mentioned it when we discussed Cuddy. Can I take a look?" House gestured for him to go ahead and Nolan did a quick scan of the pages. "Gestation, gender, chromosomes look good, no other issues related to the cleft lip and palate…everything looks fine."

"Of course he does, he's from good genetic stock." House deflected.

"Why didn't you mention this earlier? This is great news. Unless you weren't sure you wanted to talk about it…because something related is bothering you." Nolan's gaze sought an answer in the other man's face.

"We haven't had the appointment yet. Cuddy hasn't seen them." House hoped that Nolan would fall for his excuse of guilt but then again he was familiar with his deceit.

Of course, he saw right through that excuse. "No, you've stolen her test results before and didn't care what she thought. That isn't it. This is about the baby." He pondered with a furrowed brow and tightly pressed lips; his chin rested on his interlaced fingers. "Is it because you are having a son?"

House's eyes gave him up as they darted from their locked gaze with Nolan. "It's stupid. I know I had nothing to do with it."

"Sometimes it's hard to reconcile our feelings with what we know to be true. Why don't you tell me about it."

House let out a sigh. He hated to be like one of those irrational imbeciles that wandered in and out of the hospital's clinic. Those that convince themselves that they have some rare horrible disease after googling their symptoms and whose brain has given up complete control to anxiousness.

"My mother was pregnant with a boy when I was four and miscarried."

"Fear of the 'what ifs' is common with expecting parents, especially when the 'what ifs' hit so close to home."

But that wasn't what was bothering him…well…that wasn't all of it. The memory did elicit fears that at any moment it might all be taken away. That wasn't all of it and he wasn't sure if he would let Nolan know the true extent of it.

"I think it was John's kid. He was depressed and angry. It's the only time I remember him crying. My mom hardly came out of her room for weeks." His voice had lost its usual strength, it was low and vulnerable. "John looked at me the day we buried the fetus and told me that I was supposed to have protected my brother."

"You know there was nothing you could have done." Nolan ached for his patient. What kind of father puts that on a four-year-old…or any child for that matter? Everyone wants someone to blame after a miscarriage and it was easier to blame the result of his wife's affair than anything else.

"I know! That doesn't stop the thoughts." He buried his face in his hands.

"What thoughts are those exactly? Speak them out loud to me."

That's the hardest thing sometimes, to verbalize your fears. If we verbalize them it admits their reality, it means you can push them further down to be dealt with another time.

"It's the same damn thing!" He was pissed at himself for allowing it to resurface.

"You've told me before. What's different this time?"

"I don't want to be alone. Happiness is within reach and we've worked through so much. This might be something I have no control over." His voice cracked through the rage he channeled as a pillar to hide behind. Nolan sat, unmoving, for him to repeat that fear aloud. "I'm afraid of being alone."

"Why do you think you'll be alone?"

"Because I can't handle if something goes wrong with this pregnancy. I'll look for someone to blame and it'll be me, or I'll take it out on Cuddy to push her away from my destruction."

"You know the chances of something going wrong with the pregnancy are pretty low. Have you been grounding your thoughts, like we've been working on?"

The remainder of the session was more CBT drilling. The tricks did help but it didn't bring relief as quickly as he wished. He left the appointment feeling exhausted, like usual. The wind was bringing with it the beginning of fall. The chill that whipped the back of his neck heightened the tenseness of his body. The grey sky defused the light that loomed over his slow hobbled march back to his car.

His father's words haunted him. _"I pity whatever family you manage to scrape together."_

_I don't beat Rachel. Cuddy is happy and free to live her life how she wants. Rachel and I watch cartoons together. I will be proud of Rachel and my son, no matter what they choose._


	11. Worry No More

**Chapter 11: Worry No More**

She rolled off of him, under the sheets, the both of them glistening with sweat. They were out of breath, their hearts pounded, and adrenaline coursed through their veins.

"Woman, you're going to kill me with that body." He managed, through labored breathing and interlaced his fingers with hers.

"Take advantage of it now because soon enough you're going to get a nice long break."

He propped himself up on his elbow and leaned over her as she lay on her side. "That might kill me too."

"You're just gonna have to be happy with your new son." She kissed him.

His smile faded as seriousness replaced it and he plopped down on his side. _He's nervous, that's okay. _

When Cuddy found out he had stolen her amnio results and read them beforehand, she was angry. But the relief from the news that their son was otherwise healthy outweighed any anger she had. They had to make it to term, keep her from overdoing herself, and deal with the cleft. The results didn't relieve his tension, however. He thought to know would allow him to rationalize away his other worries but it just proved to make it more real.

"We need to start thinking about names. Do you have any ideas?" Pondering possible names always filled her with hope and excitement; she hoped it would ease his tension. A long silence passed between her question and his answer.

"I always like the name, Hendrix." She laughed at his absurdity.

"We are not naming our son after Jimi Hendrix." He rolled over to lay on his stomach and propped himself on his elbows.

"What were you thinking; some archaic Jewish name?"

"I would like it to be Jewish, yes."

"Why? Why do you choose to be Jewish only at times like these?"

"I don't choose to be Jewish. I AM Jewish. Don't be an ass."

"You're about as religious as I am honoring of the protocol at the hospital." He sits up and swings his legs over the side, facing away from her.

"Greg..." She touched his shoulder. "We could both choose 3 reasonable names and the other pick their favorite of the three. One can be his first and the other his middle. He's the both of ours."

"I still have a few months to convince you." He said, rising from the bed and limping heavily to the bathroom.

-Huddy-

"A twenty-seven-year-old came in wearing a professional painting mask, being previously diagnosed with Multiple Chemical Sensitivity (MCS)." Goff offered.

"So, do you believe everything people tell you? Nobody is randomly allergic to everything. Why are you here again?" House responded, rolling his eyes at her idiotic suggestion.

"I thought it would be an interesting case. She is experiencing very real and harmful symptoms: breathing problems, chest pain, syncope, joint pain, memory loss, and extreme fatigue."

Taub and Chase were just as disinterested as House. The American Medical Association didn't consider it to be a medical illness but rather a psychiatric one.

"Send her to a psychiatrist. I can't do anything for her."

Goff feigned a look of shock. "Let it be known that the great Dr. Greg House has admitted defeat." She announced, prodding at his inflated ego.

Her comment got the attention of Chase and Taub. The dominant ram's authority was being tested by an up and coming adolescent.

"No, I have better things to waste my time with, like my wastepaper basketball tournament."

He disregarded, tossing a crumpled paper into the basket across the room when Cuddy and Foreman entered.

"Ah, I knew that janitor couldn't keep his mouth shut."

The two shared a questioning glare wondering if the other had heard of his latest escapade.

"We're sharing this office until the construction is done. What did you do House?" Cuddy cut House a stern look.

"Oh well if you haven't found out yet then it's obviously not a problem."

She was too busy to pry from him whatever he'd done. It'll come out in time and if it didn't, it was just another thing that he'd get away with. For all she knew, he was bluffing.

"Goff, did you give him the team's new case?"

Goff hoped to convince him to choose the case himself, instead of through obligation to his superiors. If he chose the case he would take it as a challenge, but instead, they would all be dealing with a student trying to evade writing a report for English class.

"I was just-"

"What new case?" Foreman demanded.

Turning to him, Cuddy informed him of the MCS case. "She is the niece of a donor who is pulled out earlier this year. It would help to smooth our transition."

Foreman sighed, hating to waste the department's time on MCS. "It would, but Cuddy this department is under my supervision now and you have to run these things by me."

You could see the hackles raise before her rational mind took control. It was his department and she had no authority. This was going to take some getting used to, but he was right so she relented.

"House, just run some tests. Pretend it's any other case; ignore her and have the team do all the work as you mock their suggestions."

Foreman expected House to put up a fight, as was usual when Cuddy chose a case for them, but there was none.

House opened his mouth to begin his protest until he looked into Cuddy's eyes. There was more in her eyes or was there? Was it that she is going to bare his child or that he felt a responsibility to protect her? Either way, he had to protect her from herself and causing trouble wouldn't aid her ability to rest.

"Fine, anyone can prescribe her SSRIs." He took his pad out and scribbled a script. "Who are we treating next? A millionaire's great aunt with dementia?"

The Deans' responses were nearly identical: furrowed brows accompanied by a grimace.

-Huddy-

"We're not going to put her in an isolation room. There's no reason for it." House told Goff

"That doesn't matter. It matters that we can do real testing about what caused this in the first place. And test what's causing her real symptoms that go far beyond psychiatric."

Chase stepped in. "We could dress up a room and tell her it's an isolation room."

"Are you okay with that Master?" House yelled to Foreman who sat in the office studying papers.

Foreman rolled his eyes and ignored the diagnostician.

"The great one has spoken…or rather silently ignored, you must be used to that Goff, make it happen."

Goff rolled her eyes, it wasn't worth the argument and now wasn't the time for one. After his fellows left, Foreman entered and began his lecture.

"Don't make this hard on me House. I know why you treat the way you do. I know how you think and the rules you object to and I sympathize with that. The problem is not what you do as much as it is how you carry it out. Try to follow the rules. I won't always be able to protect you."

All Foreman received in return was a mocking salute from House. He knew how much the diagnostician hated lectures like the one he'd just received, but they must set a foundation for their new relationship.

"Goff's internship is coming to an end before you know it and you're already down one fellow. I need you to start looking for replacements. You can hire one or two fellows or a fellow and take on another intern, but I want them chosen before the baby arrives."

House hated the process of hiring; everyone looks like a moron on paper. They can have their name on dozens of articles and be worthless outside of research. They could have zero experience but have an excellent mind for puzzles. Some have stupid standards and can't handle what Housed demanded and others have no standards and don't care enough about the patient, it's all about the game. He wondered if Foreman would allow a repeat of Taub's hiring process.

-Huddy-

House and Rachel just finished dinner when Cuddy returned from a long day. She kicked off her shoes, shrugged off her coat, and stretched her sore back. Cuddy could hear Rachel's footsteps come rushing to her from the dining room.

"Mommy! You're home!" The child was a bundle of energy. If she didn't know any better she would have thought that House pumped her full of chocolate. That was possible, she supposed, Rachel didn't seem a bit worn from the day. Then again House did enjoy the time they shared after Rach went to bed. What Cuddy would give to feel like that right now.

"Hey, let mommy sit down before you get too excited." With a hand rubbing her lower back she made her way to the couch. Rachel crawled into her lap and wrapped her arms tightly around her neck. She saw the concern in House's eyes. He was running a diagnostic from the second he saw her enter. Their eyes met, _I'm okay, don't worry._ She wished he wouldn't, being pregnant didn't mean she was debilitated. She was fine, a bit tired and sore but fine.

"Let's put you to bed okay?"

"But mommy, you just got home!" Rachel whined.

Cuddy rose and led her daughter down the hall. "I know but you'll see me plenty this weekend. We're spending the whole weekend together at Greg's house."

Rachel's smile fades and her brows drew together "This is dad's house."

"It is." Cuddy couldn't help but smile. Her...their sweet daughter was so taken by the man who would soon be her legal father. They were building something she never thought could exist between them. "We are going where he used to live."

"My old bachelor pad!" House echoed from the doorway of Rachel's bedroom. "It's where a man sleeps and keeps all his toys before he has a family."

Rachel's eyes lit up at the mention of toys and she looked to her mother for confirmation. Cuddy rolled her eyes. Men always glorified their nasty testosterone-filled caves.

"It's a dirty place, where men act like children." This didn't seem to faze her daughter's excitement one bit.

"I have a bigger TV than your mom and a piano." He was going to win this. Bachelor pads may be less than sanitary but are more carefree.

Talk of their exciting weekend plans wasn't helping the child wind down for the night. She fought her mother every step of the way: through bath time, combing her hair, and brushing her teeth, biding every second to stay up longer. It took half an hour longer than normal but they finally got her to bed.

"You look exhausted." He rubbed her shoulder as he searched her eyes.

"I'm fine. Things usually ramp up this time of year and I'm carrying around a few extra pounds. After Rachel's adoption next week that'll be one less thing we have to do."

_Is he even listening?_ House was slouched on the sofa, flipping through the local channels, and completely ignoring her. "You did remember that didn't you?"

"Yes, of course, I did." He didn't meet her eyes, worry laid low on his face.

"Are you worried about the hearing?"

She reached over and laid a hand on his knee, startling him from his trance. _Yes, I'm worried about the hearing! Who in their right might would give custody of a child to an old, crippled, drug addict and who would blame them? _This was happening faster than he was prepared for. He couldn't let her know, she had enough on her mind.

"Why would I be? We've talked about this. It's fine."

His voice was tense and she still wasn't sure if she believed him. His body language resembled that of stress caused by a particularly difficult case. His posture stiff and tight and rubbed his aching thigh. He reeked of stress, but then again it could be the pain, causing him stress.

"Does your leg hurt?"

"It does. I'm going to take a hot bath."

"Want company?" He refused her offer and limped away, strongly favoring his right leg, as he walked to the bathroom.

After House's bath, which didn't seem to have helped, they settled into bed.

"We should start feeling it kick soon. They say early on they can be confused with gas."

She looked blissful, laying there in a thin nightgown rubbing her growing stomach. She was peaceful and happy, that's all he could ask for. The sight of her peace warded off the latest wave of uneasiness, at least for the moment. He joined her on the bed and enjoyed her embrace. The tension from his body faded for the first time in hours.

This is one such moment that she had dreamed of for years. That most women dream of most of their lives; lying in bed with their lover and expecting their creation. It was bliss. She took his hand in hers and rested it on her abdomen. She let go to try and share the feeling of their growing child with him, but when his palm hit her stomach he yanked it away and their moment ended.

-Huddy-

Cuddy woke, hours later, to a dim light shining under the door and a rhythmic thump of a cane. The pillow beside her was empty. His bath didn't seem to have helped his leg when he came to bed, and knowing him, he probably hasn't slept yet. She pushed herself up from the bed to check on him if there was anything that she could do to help.

"You okay?"

"No, I couldn't sleep." He said, turning his back to her, heading back to his other pacing point.

"I can massage it if you think that would help?"

"It's late. You should be asleep."

"So should you." She followed his pacing. "Let me massage it."

"Fine." He relented, limping his way to the couch. She took a seat by him and began to work on the inflamed remains of his muscle. The lines on his face began to soften as he relaxed against the back of the couch.

"Are you sure it's just your leg? There's nothing else bothering you?"

"No, damn it! I'm missing a fist full of muscle and sometimes are just worse than others. I'm not imagining this!"

It had been a long time since he had spoken to her like that. She knew it was the lack of sleep and pain that made him this irritable but that didn't make it better.

"I do not doubt you. I know that different things set it off. One of those things is being tense from stress."

At that moment his eyes shot open and he had an idea. He completely missed what she meant but at least he has a distraction now.

He donned his coat and left, bidding her goodnight.

-Huddy-

Wilson and House sat in the cafeteria having lunch that afternoon. His friend looked tired but he did get here in the wee hours of the morning. Cuddy had approached him that morning about House's behavior. She expected he was hiding something. That something, other than the pain in his leg, was keeping him up at night. It was expected of House to run from his feelings and hide whatever was bothering him but she was right, there was something there.

"Have you two chosen a name yet?" Wilson asked through a bite of fries.

"She was against Hendrix, can you believe it?"

_So that was a no, they hadn't chosen a name. Instead of staying strictly on the subject, he veered to her perception of the name he had chosen, interesting._

"Cuddy looks like she's feeling better than the first trimester."

House couldn't help but agree, although without conviction.

_It was true, her face was brighter and her steps lighter. She beamed with happiness as she strode the halls of the hospital. The gossip had returned to normal levels, she had nearly made up for the donations that were lost during the transition, and their baby was basically healthy. She was a happy mom, but there was something still bothering House, like a blister you rubbed raw and refused to treat._

"How are you handling the idea of becoming a father?"

"Does it matter?"

"Yes, House…pregnancy can be nerve-racking for both parents. Have you talked with Cuddy about it?"

"When exactly would I do that? After she worked 12 hours and is ready to collapse?" His tone was sharp, he had struck a nerve.

"She's worried about you."

"About me? She needs to worry more about herself."

"You need to tell her what's bothering you." Wilson's tone was earnest, he could see why she was so concerned about House. _I haven't seen him this wound up since he found out she was pregnant. Okay so it wasn't that long ago but it was a life-altering moment._

"Nothing's bothering me."

"Back when you were always a miserable ass, I might have let you think I believe that." He took another bite of his fries. "Look, if you don't want to talk to me or Cuddy, that's fine but call Nolan. That's what he's there for, otherwise, Cuddy will keep worrying about you."

"Fine dad!" House joked before stealing his last fry.

Wilson was right, bottling all this up wouldn't serve him or his family. Talking about this to Cuddy was out of the question and he wasn't ready to talk to Wilson about it. I'll call Nolan this afternoon.

-Huddy-

His discussion with Nolan had proven helpful but per usual it left him more exhausted than before. Counseling is supposed to make you feel better but it sure as hell was exhausting.

It was just past seven when Cuddy returned to their, now shared, office. His team was about to discharge their patient. It just so happened, that she had Lyme. She took a seat in his Eames chair and massaged her temples.

"You're still here? Didn't Kraydel tell you to take it easy?"

"There's still so much to do. If I get it done now there will be less to do later in the pregnancy."

"Something new will come up, Cuddy! You have to delegate some of this shit. You haven't been home on time once this week." Anger dripped from his words. He was tired of her disregard for her health and the health of their baby.

"This is my job House! This is what you- Ahhh!"

She felt a sharp pain in her ribs that took her breath away. A smile broke through the shock upon realizing what it was. She snatched House's hand and pressed it against the kicks. He felt the small tap tap against his hand and even being a doctor, and knowing what a kick felt like, he wasn't prepared.

Their boy was working his muscles and preparing to enter the world. On one hand, it seemed as though it had lasted an eternity but on the other, it seemed just a blink of an eye. It was just a matter of weeks and their son would be there. The thought of it frightened him more than he was willing to admit. It's just a baby. They just need fed, held, and changed.

"Can you feel it?" She asked excitedly.

He yanked his hand away. "Yeah, they do that."

-Huddy-

It was dark and Cuddy still hadn't made it home, he and Rachel were bound for another night alone. He didn't mind nights with Rachel, she was a pretty good kid, but Lisa was supposed to stop working so late. She needed rest. He couldn't handle another night of no sleep so he took Nolan's advice and invited Wilson over as a distraction.

Wilson brought a pizza and salad for the three of them.

"Rachel! The delivery man is here!" House called as she came running.

"Wilson!" She flung herself around his waist.

"Here kiddo let me put this stuff down and you can get a proper hug."

The three of them sat in the living room with their plates, to enjoy their dinner. House and Wilson sat on the couch and Rachel on the floor. Wilson made the mistake of asking her what movie she wanted to watch. House knew which she would pick, Beauty and the Beast. It had become her obsession as of late, they watched it at least twice a week.

House would never admit it but at least it was a well-done film. The music was good and the story was classic, but he would definitely lose points on his man card for this. So far Wilson hadn't given him much of a hard time about it, he was too preoccupied with Rachel's narration. Wilson was a natural with kids, yet here he sits…a bachelor three times divorced with no children.

"Mommy always said Daddy was the Beast! He's grumpy at work." Rachel informed the oncologist.

Wilson chuckled and looked at his friend. "Is that right?

"Yeah! And he said that made her Beauty."

House felt the urge to belch and scratch himself to reassert his manhood. Wilson was getting far too much entertainment from this.

"If you tell anybody I'll have to bring out those pictures of you in Boston."

Wilson's smile faded at the threat, those pictures must never see the light of day. House might have acted embarrassed about Rachel's comments but in the years that he knew the man, it was rare for him to exhibit the joy he did now. There wasn't pain, anger, or sorrow, right now there was just peace.

He hated to ruin his friend's mood but he had to know he was handling his earlier situation. The Beast and Gaston were grappling on the roof when Wilson asked if he spoke with Cuddy yet.

"No, I called Nolan."

"And he helped?"

House shrugged, not turning his eyes from the movie. "I need you to watch her. She's too stubborn to listen to me."

He nodded. That's what prompted his invitation; House needed the distraction. House tended to take advantage of anything he could, but Cuddy was the opposite. She would go over and beyond her power if it meant she would accomplish her goal. Cuddy saw his advice as just another instance of him exploiting Dr. Kraydel's advice. She didn't think she was overworking herself, but since it was nearing nine and she had been there all day, he was obviously right in his concern.

-Huddy-

A/N: Hope you enjoyed it! The next chapter is a fun little weekend at House's apartment with Cuddy and Rachel. The next few chapters after that House's mom comes over for Rachel's adoption! Also, what would you want the baby named? I have some ideas but I want to hear your ideas!


	12. Never Going Back

Chapter 12: Never Going Back

A/N: This is for those of you who love Rachel/House moments. Next few chapters are about Blythe's visit. I'm very excited about Blythe's visit. She'll be giving us some insight into House and they will all share some very sweet moments.

-Huddy-

"I'm ready to see your old, man house!" Rachel pronounced excitedly from the back seat.

He scoffed, even though she was right, he didn't want to be seen that way. No one wants an old man for a father.

"Did you just call me old?" He asked looking back at her through the rearview mirror.

"No! It's your old house, not the new one you live in with me and mommy. But you're older than me."

He chortled. "You want to hear a secret?" She nodded vigorously from her car seat in the back. "I'm older than you and your mom put together."

Her eyes were as big as saucers and her mouth agape. This seemed to be the most amazing thing that Rachel had ever heard. He may have just changed her opinion on his age but the look on her face and exclamations of amazement were worth it.

When they arrived, they stood outside his door. Excitement bounced around in the girl like a ping pong ball. _I may have built this up too much. She's going to be bored and unimpressed. Who was I kidding? I don't have anything for kids here._

"Don't get too excited it's all boring adult stuff."

"But yours and stuff I've never seen before."

"You've been here before."

"But now you're my dad!"

She said that as if it made all the difference. It was sweet but it made him hurt all the more. How could he live up to her standard? He bit the bullet and opened the door. She ran in and surveyed the entire apartment, touching everything. _Damn it, this place isn't child safe. What was Cuddy thinking when she suggested this?_

She promised not only that she would get off on time today, but that she'd leave early. She was true to her word. Thankfully Cuddy stopped by their house and brought some more things for Rachel and dinner. It hadn't been long and Rachel was already bored out of her skull. It was the first time this week that Cuddy had made it home for dinner, much to House's relief. Lisa had worked far too many hours this week. He caught her several times attempting to massage away migraines. When he suggested they check her blood pressure, she dismissed his concern. When he suggested that she go ahead and go home, he was met with fierce resistance.

-Huddy-

Dinner was good, but they hadn't thought about where Rachel might sleep? There was the couch but it was hardly cozy. He had an old sleeping bag and a few extra blankets that might help. His bed was too small for them all to spend the weekend on.

"Rachel honey, you're going to sleep on the sofa this weekend okay?"

She was obviously not sold on the idea of sleeping in the living room on his cold lumpy couch.

"We'll make you a blanket fort. It'll be like a campout." Lisa said enthusiastically but House was skeptical. "Did you not make blanket forts as a child?"

"John would have said blankets are for warmth and not to play with."

Her sister and she had spent many nights together in blanket forts. Their mother hated the idea, but their father encouraged them every step of the way. It was the closest to camping that she ever wanted to get but none-the-less exciting.

"Well, we're going to change that!"

With a flat sheet, couch, two dining room chairs and 4 chip clips, it was an excellent fort. It added a level of excitement to an otherwise boring sleeping arrangement. Rachel's eyes gleamed at the adult proof room they had constructed. The opening was just small enough to keep out the adults and just big enough for her to crawl in.

"Rachel, the table in the hall should have some extra blankets in it, go get them."

Her little feet thundered down the hall, followed by several thumps and the sound of small falling objects. When she returned she carried a bundle of blankets larger than herself. They stuffed them all in the tent and when they were through it had been transformed into a regular cocoon.

"Goodnight, Calamity Jane." He bid Rachel, who had snuggled in her retreat, as he hobbled down the hall to bed.

"No! You said you would play your piano for me!" She wined from inside the fort.

"Do we have to tonight?" It was a long day and tomorrow was going to prove to be even longer.

"Yes! You promised!" Her head poked out of the entrance and she brandished a pout.

House was powerless to deny her; after all, the piano might be just the thing that he needed to melt away the cares of the day. He sat on the hard wooden bench and began Clair de Lune by Debussy.

The tune transported the listener to a cool summer night, laying on the grass, as the stars sparkle brightly above while a gentle wind patting them to slumber. It wasn't long until he heard Rachel's soft snores.

When he returned to the bedroom, Lisa stood, holding a half-empty prescription bottle, her eyes filled with concern and panic flooded him.

"Greg, I found this by the hall cabinet."

"It must have been hidden in the blankets."

"What would have happened if she took some? We can't let this happen." Her tone bordered on anger.

The last thing he needed was a lecture. He knew damn well what could happen if Rachel got ahold of Vicodin. _Does she really think that I'm that careless?_

"I didn't know it was in there! Making cleaning out my old life a family affair was your idea!" He couldn't win. He just couldn't win.

She wanted to scream back that he was the one that drove himself to this lifestyle but then again…he was the one who crawled himself out. Behind the veil of anger, she saw a glimmer of insecurity and vulnerability. She knew it would be a huge step for him and she hoped by having them here that it would remind him why he was doing it. She couldn't stay angry.

"You're right. You've done a great job with her and in your recovery. You didn't deserve the accusations. Forgive me?" She placed her hand on his shoulder.

"You may have to pay a pittance." He winked and brought her other hand further up his leg.

-Huddy-

They began in the bedroom and bathroom the next day, while Rachel played in the living room. Cuddy went through the bathroom, it was simple enough: dispose of expired and half-used toiletries and sort out any towels and washcloths that might still be salvageable. When she finished, all that was left was what was needed for the rest of the weekend: a few washcloths, a shower curtain, a bar of soap, toilet paper, and a few towels. When she joined House in his bedroom it looked like a tornado had hit. Things spilled out from the closet, covering the floor, and mounds of things on the bed.

"Did you plan on trapping yourself in here until you're finished?"

"I have to get this over with." He grumbled, bent over from his seat on the side of the bed, and rifled through a pile of things that lay on his nightstand.

She meandered her way through the mess and began bringing things closer for his inspection. Trash bags filled quickly with things he was no longer in need of: clothes he didn't wear, old magazines, and other knick-knacks. She walked them out to the curb as he filled them, checking on Rachel on her way in and out.

Rachel kept herself well entertained with coloring books and her baby doll. She was fascinated with House's 'giant black DVDs.' That was a shot to their pride not only did the child not know what records were but was also unaware of CDs. House eagerly began her 'education on the classics.' Lisa had already switched through a few records for her. Dr. John boomed through the room, House insisted that he was a vital part of any musical education. She didn't see it but Rachel seemed to enjoy it. When she returned to his bedroom several boxes were ready to be closed.

"You won Rachel over. She's in there dancing with her baby doll."

"There's hope for that kid yet!" He said, through a pleased grin.

They finished most of the room by then and all that was left was the remains of the closet. She was pulling down everything from the top shelf when she found a cigar box with a pistol in it.

"Are you supposed to have this?" She asked, showing him the contents of the box.

"I haven't been convicted of anything…major. I'll get a safe for it."

"Was it John's?"

He nodded.

"I'm surprised you kept some of his things."

"We had some good times at the range. That pistol is a classic." He said fondly, taking the box from her.

"Are you sure you're ready for this? You seem nervous about it." She asked

"Gun safety isn't that complex. Keep the barrel pointed away from things you don't want to kill."

"No, I mean moving from your apartment."

House was quickly sorting things into different boxes, as though he was racing the clock. "I've lived here a while but I have moved before. It's fine."

Lisa sat near him on the edge of the bed and ran her hand over the comforter.

"I can't help but think of our first night together in this apartment." She said seductively, with a mischievous grin.

His hand drifted to her body. "I'd be glad to reenact the more pleasant parts of that night."

Their lips met and the passion began growing. Their hands explored one another, his landing on her breasts.

"Eww kisses," Rachel exclaimed from the door.

House was caught like a deer in headlights, not removing his hands from their resting place.

"Greg!" Lisa shrugged him off. "What is it, sweetie?"

"I'm bored. I want to go play!"

-Huddy-

House returned with lunch, at the park near his apartment where Rachel was playing. It was nearly one when Rachel barged in on them, begging to play. They spent well over an hour there eating and watching her. By the time they returned, Rachel was getting cranky.

"I don't want to take a nap!"

"You're tired, you need to take a nap," Lisa argued.

"How about this Rach, you can stay up and watch a show with me and your mom, but you have to lay down and be still. Deal?" He stuck out his hand for her to shake.

"What about my fort?"

"We'll rebuild it tonight. See if we can make a better one."

Rachel returned his handshake. Lisa couldn't help but smile at the two of them. He was so relaxed with her. He didn't speak to her like a child incapable of understanding, but always made a point to explain things in terms she could understand.

It wasn't long after they began their show that Rachel fell asleep stretched across their laps. Her head rested on House's leg and her feet on her mother's lap. The plan was to get Rachel asleep and continue their packing, but House was fading fast.

Lisa got up and continued to clean and scrub parts of his apartment that hadn't seen the light of day since he moved in. Before the pregnancy, this amount of moving, kneeling, lifting and walking wouldn't have phased her but her body was beginning to ache. It had been nearly two hours when she heard movement from the living room, Rachel and House had awoken from their sleep.

"How was your nap, Greg?" "It wasn't a nap. I was just exemplifying the importance of rest. You could use a lesson on that." He teased and began to pilfer through the bookcase in the hall.

Rachel was right on his heels, helping put books into their proper box. Most of these books were ones he hadn't read in a while and most were bound for a used bookstore. Rachel pulled out a few books from the bottom shelf and flipped through their contents.

"Is this Peter Pan?" Rachel exclaimed with a ratty old hardback in her hand. "It's old!"

"It's not that old!" He snatched it from her hand. "It's well-read."

He loved that book as a child. The dream of remaining a kid, free from the oppression of adults appealed to him. In his mind, his father was always Captain Hook, the tyrant who he never wished to grow up as. But as years pressed on and he realized the true point of the book…his fondness faded, all people have to grow up. Endless potentiality fades into actuality, which was always less glorious than what was dreamed.

"Can you read it to me tonight?" Rachel asked, calling him out of his musings.

"We can just watch the movie. It's a longer book than what you're used to."

"No! I want to hear it from the book!"

She was adamant. There was no way he could deny her pleading. "Have it your way."

Rachel shot up to her feet, grabbed the book from House, and ran to tell her mother the good news. He had done better than he expected, clearing out his den of depravity where he hid for so many years. But that blast from the past hit him hard, even harder now that his daughter wanted him to read her the book. He felt like a moron for letting a child's book have such an impact on him.

Lisa saw him hunkered over a box of books. He looked worn, his hard years shown on his face.

"You don't have to do this."

"Do what?" "Get rid of this place."

"No, I don't suppose I do. It'd be a good place to come when the new spawn is crying all night." He said sarcastically, not meeting her eyes and keeping to his task.

She reached for his arm. "House, I'm serious."

"So am I! Do you want me to move back in here?"

"Of course not!"

"Then stop telling me to. I've made my decision."

-Huddy-

Before they made it to bed the previous day they finished the hall and the entire kitchen. He didn't plan on bringing much with him: his piano, guitars, some oddments, and a library of books. It was more than he had originally estimated but they would have plenty of room in the house he had his eye on. They just had the living room left.

Lisa was cleaning up after him as he cleared a space; when she found a book shoved to the back of one of the bottom shelves. It was an old photo album, signed by his mom for his high school graduation. Its pages were full of pictures of him from birth to eighteen. Some were black and white, like his baby portrait, but most were in color. Even in his baby portrait, there was a bright inquisitiveness to his eyes, as they studied the camera. Somethings never change.

"You were a cute baby, Greg."

"For some of us, age doesn't affect our beauty." He said haughtily.

Rachel scrambled nearer so she could see too.

"That's dad?" She asked pointing to the faded photo. "That's an old picture!"

"He's pretty ancient." Lisa jested, earning his objection.

He wasn't one to share things about his past, but they were his family. Rachel was in awe of watching him grow throughout the pictures and of all the neat places he had been. Lisa, on the other hand, noticed just how alone he always was. She didn't see one party of his with more than just a single friend and on each birthday it was a different one. They may have moved to a new exotic place every three to five years, but still, it seemed a lonely way to grow up. She gazed up at him and saw the pain behind his eyes. There were stories behind each of the pictures, his mother had included so lovingly.

"What are you doing in this one?" Rachel pointed to a yellowing photo of him bent over something in the grass.

"I was building a rocket in our backyard. We lived on Pearl Harbor at the time so setting it off was frowned upon."

"You never got to shoot it?"

"I never said that. Mom thought it was great but the security forces weren't that impressed."

That explained a lot. His mom seemed to be the rebellious type, like him, and she was proud of his mind. From the way the brightness faded from his eyes after the story, she knew there was more to it. _He always hated his father and he was an old school marine. What sort of punishment did he get for this little stunt and how aware of that punishment was his mother?_

When House got older he was surrounded by more and more people, mostly teammates and other athletes. One of the last pictures was of him on prom night, with his date. She wore a black dress, cut high above the knee with a pair of Chuck Taylors that matched his own. She had a feeling his father was grimacing behind the camera and that the couple had no plans to make it to prom.

Every family picture that his father was in, Greg's smile was forced. If she didn't know better she would have thought it was a model family taken from various frames for sale. It wasn't, this was his life: a tyrannical father, quietly rebellious but doting mother, and a lonely and damaged child. Next weekend, she would have to sit down with Blythe and get some insight into his childhood.


	13. Child of Mine Part 1

Chapter 13: Child of Mine Part 1

A/N: Part one of two, hope you all enjoy. Thank you for all the reviews and encouragement. I am so grateful. Also, if any of you would be interested in beta reading for me I would greatly appreciate it!

-Huddy-

Blythe's plane finally landed. She was so surprised when Greg called about Rachel, but that was weeks ago. She couldn't lie, she had given up on the concept of grandkids a long time ago, but she couldn't help being excited. Wilson gave some information about Rachel, but other than that kept oddly silent. There was more going on than Rachel's adoption. Was her son finally going to marry that boss of his or was it something else? Was Wilson busy or did he want Greg to tell her in person? Walking outside with her bags, she spotted him waiting. No doubt, it was Lisa's idea for him to pick her up, but she was still grateful.

"Greg"

_My sweet blue-eyed boy._ An affectionate grin passed his lips as they embraced. She wasn't about to push him for information, he would tell her whatever he wanted her to know. Lisa may be a bit more forthcoming, but she wouldn't push.

"It's so nice to see you, Greg."

"You too mom."

"I'm so happy you invited me."

He nodded and opened the passenger side door for her. It was a quiet ride back to their house. Her head buzzed with questions and her heart fluttered with elation. She was going to have a granddaughter and for all intents and purposes…a daughter, but more important than that her son seemed happy.

When they arrived, Lisa and Rachel met them at the door. Rachel looked like she was about to jump out of her skin with excitement. Lisa wore a gentle smile and her hand rested gently on her belly.

"Mommy, it's her!" Rachel whispered loudly.

Blythe squatted to meet Rachel face to face. "Are you Rachel?"

The child nodded excitedly. "Are you dad's mom?"

"I am. Can I have a hug?"

Rachel launched herself into Blythe's arms, nearly knocking her to the ground. When they let go, Rachel insisted she show her the house and drug her through the doorway for a personal tour. It was a fury of words: what each room was, what they did in each room, and so on. The child was absolutely adorable.

"I'm sure Blythe is tired, why don't you let her sit down Rachel." Lisa beckoned

"I'll take you to the couch!"

Then Blythe was being led into the living room by her hand and Rachel filled her lap.

"How old are you? No, let me guess…you speak well, you're getting tall…are you five?"

Rachel was enthralled to be confused for a five-year-old, after all, they go to big school! But Blythe, of course, knew Lisa would have her in school today if she was that old.

Rachel shook her head, "No, I'm four!" and sported the correct number of fingers.

"Wow! And a smart four-year-old at that! What's your favorite color?"

"Red, that's what me and mommy always wear together."

It was one of Lisa and Rachel's things, anytime Lisa wore red Rachel demanded to wear a matching outfit. Lisa couldn't help but choke up at how well the two got along. The Houses seemed to be doing that to her a lot lately, she could only hope it stayed this way. _Children need to know their grandparents_, her hand drifted to her stomach.

There it is again. If I didn't know better…well, I guess I don't know better. Curiosity would have to wait though…this was Rachel's time.

It was dark when Blythe landed at the airport and quite some time had passed since then.

"Rachel, it's getting close to your bedtime."

"I don't want to go to bed!"

"Remember what we talked about!" Lisa answered sternly.

Rachel's head fell in defeat. "If I go to sleep on time tonight I'll be ready for more fun tomorrow…"

"We'll watch one show after your bath to calm down before bed."

Blythe couldn't help but watch the girl and her mother leave the room hand-in-hand.

"You have a beautiful family Greg. I'm happy for you."

"Thanks, mom."

"I noticed Lisa holding her stomach…is there something more going on?"

"Nothing unusual."

"Greg, I'm old enough to tell the difference between a lady gaining some weight and her being pregnant."

He diverted his gaze for a moment before returning with a grin. "Yeah, she's pregnant."

"Oh, Gregory!" Blythe's eyes filled with tears and she wrapped her arms around his neck. "I'm so happy for you!"

He returned her hug, wishing she had been this excited about Rachel. _She didn't deserve treated any different._ _Then again…she waited until now to ask, when Rachel was out of the room._

"Can we watch Henry the Hippo?" Rachel asked excitedly as she skipped into the living room with her PJs on.

"How about Dora?" House offered.

Blythe watched as Greg and Rachel settled on the couch together and started the cartoon. It had been decades since she'd seen his eyes this bright. He answered all the show's questions in fluent Spanish and Rachel gawked at his ability.

"He's really good with her." She said to Lisa, who sat nearest her.

"Yeah, he's really surprised me. He's usually so brash…but not with her."

"He was such a smart, loving, cuddly little boy." Regret flashed across her eyes as she watched her son.

Fiery anger flared in Lisa but she knew better than to ask those questions yet. It was just the beginning of her visit.

"What changed? Even in college, he was guarded."

"I guess it started after the wreck. Greg and I were in the car going to get groceries. He was about 4 and I was in my third trimester…"

Blythe's voice cracked and her eyes misted over.

"I lost the baby. I was inconsolable for weeks. John thought it was just hysteria, so I was isolated in the back of the house. I could barely force myself to eat… When I finally came out…Greg had changed. John thought boys weren't supposed to cry or seek physical comfort…"

Lisa didn't know what to think. _What woman would be able to come out of something like that? Was the child John's…his only true child?_ Half of her wanted to attack Blythe, she might have had an excuse then but later why did she just bury her head in the sand and let John continue? The other half of her wanted to mourn the loss.

-Huddy-

Lisa woke to a stirring in the kitchen, it was Blythe making breakfast. It was strange, this was never something that her mother did. She heard stories of doting grandmothers who cooked and spoiled their grandchildren but had never experienced it. Arlene, even as a grandmother, expected perfection at every age. Rachel was expected to always eat everything Arlene put in front of her without complaint. Of course, that didn't happen and Rachel's curiosity only made it worse. She didn't respond to demands, she wanted to understand why.

"You didn't have to do this."

"Good morning, and of course I did, it's a grandmother's job! What would you like to drink?"

"If you could brew me some Lemon Ginger tea, I'll wake them up."

-Huddy-

Lisa decided to take the opportunity for the two of them to do some baby shopping. She was confident that Rachel was safe to leave Blythe. If anything Blythe might let her get away with too much. They took her car but Greg insisted on driving, which was unusual.

"Umm, you took the wrong turn."

"We have a pit stop to make."

It was a bit more than a pit stop considering they went in the opposite direction of the store for well over 20 minutes. They entered a gated community, full of beautiful homes on huge lots. Finally, he pulled into a driveway of a house for sale. It wasn't just any house, but the house she dreamed of every night.

"Greg, it's that house. We can't afford this!"

"It's just a tour."

The home had a beautiful Normandy Tudor exterior with red brick, a steep pitched black shingled roof, and a massive back yard. She loved the character of the home, it reminded her of a dark mysterious fortress. The inside, however, was bright with cream walls but still carried in the cast-iron railings and dark wood accents. She couldn't wait to walk inside, even though they would leave disappointed.

"Hello, Doctors Cuddy and House. I was surprised you called to tour the house this morning. It's a bit over the price we discussed."

Cuddy nodded sadly. The front door led into the living room. It was spacious with a fireplace and mantle that made a natural center; if it wasn't for the large blank corner. Lisa pictured it as the perfect home for his baby grand. The kitchen reminded her of the kitchen in House's apartment; dark and rustic but twice as large with a full island. They toured the four bedrooms, formal dining room, and three bathrooms. The master ensuite even contained a large jetted tub that would be perfect for House to soak his leg and was big enough for them to share. She looked at this house every night but never thought House paid attention. The study was perfect, filled with built-in bookcases and desk. Lastly and certainly not least it had an elevator, as well as stairs. They ended back in the main living area, which ended the realtor's presentation.

"What do you think?"

"We'll take it!" He announced, taking both of the women by surprise.

"House, no! It is 100 grand over our budget! We can't afford it." Cuddy grabbed his arm and emphatically shook her head.

"I'll leave you two here to talk it over."

"House, we can't afford it!"

"I have the difference accessible in cash today."

She wasn't convinced. She didn't know what he did with his money…well, she had a guess…but never expected that he invested it.

"I may have exaggerated my exploits with gambling and hookers but if you let that out at the hospital, I'll deny it."

She was shocked, nearly to the point of tears. Both her hands rested on his biceps, his hands on her hips.

"Oh, Greg!"

There, it was final.

"We'll take it!"

-Huddy-

They returned hours later to the smell of cookies flooding their house. They found Rachel covered in flour in the kitchen with Blythe.

"Mommy, Daddy, me and Grandma are baking cookies! She took me shopping and I got lots of presents!" Rachel swamped the couple with tales of her day, as Blythe greeted them with hugs.

Lisa worried about Blythe spoiling her, Rachel already had more toys than she knew what to do with.

"You didn't have to do that, Blythe."

"I know but I had 4 birthdays and Christmases to make up for. No more spoiling for you." She smiled and winked at Rachel. "Did the two of you have a good day?"

"Yeah, we did some shopping for the baby, had lunch, and made an offer on a house."

House was tired, all the walking they did that day proved to be more than his leg was ready for. He had to find the heating pad and prop his leg up, but also this happy family crap was pissing him off. It was hard to explain, it felt legitimate and not an act, but it was too much. Was he jealous of Rachel? Was he mad at himself for wasting so much time to have this? He didn't know and was too tired to care at the moment, he just needed some air and to rest.

Lisa entered the bedroom and found him asleep sitting in bed with a heating pad on his thigh. It was nearing dinner and she wanted to clean up before they relaxed for the evening. She woke him with a gentle pat.

"Greg, why don't you change, your mother insisted she cook us dinner."

On his way down the hall, he heard Rachel's whimpers. It wasn't the sound of her throwing a fit, she was actually crying.

"Why is she crying?" His tone was harsh and demanding, prompting a stunned look on his mother's face. He had never spoken to her like that before.

"She refused to listen to-"

"I don't care what she did! After what you- You will not discipline my children!" Anger burned the back of his neck. "If there's an issue I will handle it!"

She was shocked and heartbroken. "Yes son, I'm sorry."

He took Rachel and left her to finish working on dinner. She knew there was tension between him and John and John had always held Greg to a high standard. She thought all those years he kept his distance that it was due to John, but clearly she also held some of his animosity. It wasn't long until a pitiful, downward cast Rachel rejoined her in the kitchen.

"Did I get you in trouble?"

"No, sweetie. I got myself there."

"Why were you in trouble?" Rachel hadn't seen anything like it before.

"I've made a lot of mistakes in my life. Because of that…I don't have the right to do what I did, I'm sorry."

"It's okay, I shouldn't have thrown a fit…I'm sorry."

"It's okay sweetie." With an embrace, Rachel put the whole ordeal behind her. She wished it could be that easy with her son.

House expected a glimpse of resistance in her eyes but he didn't find any, as he watched from the entrance to the kitchen. _Damn it._ He wanted to stay angry at her but she never knew the full extent of John's abuses. John was careful to keep that under wraps.

-Huddy-

The following day was adoption day so Rachel's excitement was electric, which made getting her to bed was like herding cats, but they managed. While Greg was reading her Peter Pan, Lisa returned to the kitchen to find Blythe crying over a sink full of dishes.

"Blythe?" Lisa asked with her hand on Blythe's shoulder.

She sniffled and let out a laugh. What a sight she must have been, a grown lady crying over dishes. "Has he spoken much about John?"

"I'm afraid if you want to know about John you'll have to ask him."

"You're good for him, you know that. He and John had a strained relationship…I thought it was just John's forward opinions that made Greg so distant but I'm starting to doubt that was it."

_You're damn right that wasn't it! How did you miss it all?_ "You need to talk to him about this."

"You're right. I have so many regrets. I tried to raise him the best I knew how. Our parents, mine and John's, were a different sort of people, they lived through the great depression and the Second World War. They were more concerned with survival than comfort. We knew our parents loved us but only because of their sacrifice not because they told us. I tried to always tell Greg but as a marine, John saw emotions as a weakness for the enemy. I'm afraid of what that cost you two."

She gave Blythe a questioning look.

"I did some digging. I know how long you two have known each other and I know his feelings for you aren't new."

_So this is where he gets it from._ Lisa couldn't help but be a little impressed. She wanted to stay angry, she wanted to blame her obliviousness for Greg's pain but it was proving difficult. Blythe seemed to love her son and be unaware of what happened in her own house so many years ago.

Blythe silently worked through the last few dishes. "Thank you for welcoming me to her adoption. I better get to bed. Goodnight, Lisa."


	14. Child of Mine Part 2

**Chapter 14: Child of Mine Part 2**

A/N: I am so sorry! I didn't mean to leave you all hanging for 3 months! We just finished a 4,000-mile move and things are starting to settle down again. Expect for frequent updates!

Blythe wakes to a rhythmic thump, thump, and a light sneaking through the crack under the door to her room. She left to investigate and found House returning to the couch with a bag of chips.

"Trouble sleeping?"

"Uh, yeah."

"Nervous about tomorrow?"

"I guess you could say that."

"Don't be, you're already a better father than he was."

"Right mom…" He didn't believe her, despite all his obvious issues, she always claimed his perfection. They were empty words she felt obligated to say.

"I know you don't think I see the real you…but I do."

That was the last thing he wanted. The real him, he thought, was eternally broken and beyond repair. If she knew the real him, the him that forged prescriptions, or overdosed and hallucinated about his boss, the him who was the reason for Amber's death…

"You really don't." He said as he massaged his leg.

"I know about your drug troubles and I'm sure you have more issues, but I also know you've worked hard to overcome them. When you were a child, you had such a big heart. I can still see it." She sat beside him. "People don't change; they just get led off course. You are more than you give yourself credit for." Her face fell and guilt filled it. "I suppose some of that's my fault and I'm sorry. Know that you are so many things that he never could be: you're assertive to authority, witty, talented…He thought being tough on you would make you better." There was a pause. "He thought feelings were a weakness. Without it, you isolate yourself on an island of misery, as he did. No matter what happens tomorrow, those girls in there will still love you."

He could only nod. She touched his hand and kissed his cheek before heading off to bed. He hoped what she said was true but none of what she said made it any easier to sleep, he only had more to think about. It was going to be a long night.

-Huddy-

He managed to get a couple hours of sleep on the sofa before the rest of them began to wake. Blythe started breakfast, against Lisa's protests and Rachel was a cyclone of energy. It was adoption day. His life was going to be laid out and judged, and also his worth as a parent. The thought made his heart speed and his head ache. He hobbled to the kitchen and downed his ibuprofen.

Their breakfast was fit for royalty: bacon, eggs, biscuits, fruit, and gravy, the works. Rachel managed to down quite a bit through her mass of excited questions and stories. However, House could only bare a couple bites and absentmindedly pushed the rest around on his plate.

The woman rushed around to get dressed and preparing their hair just right, but he sat deep in thought, staring at the floor. The women were nearly ready by the time Lisa noticed that he hadn't moved an inch.

"Greg, it's almost time."

He limped down the hall to begin getting ready. Rachel caught him with his face was covered in shaving cream.

"What are you doing?" She exclaimed as Blythe finished her hair in the hall mirror.

"He has to shave for court." Blythe explained.

"I don't want him to!" The excitement caught Lisa's attention.

"At least clean up the edges." It wasn't worth the fight for Lisa: Rachel liked it that way, he would be more comfortable with it, and to be honest…she loved his stubble. She and Rachel wore baby blue dresses that matched Greg's shirt, which was tucked into a pair of black slacks. Stress wore heavy on his brow as he stared into the mirror and fixed his tie.

"What are you doing?" Rachel exclaimed from behind him. "You never wear a tie! You always tell me to be myself!"

Her scowl was enough to break through his grim demeanor and put a smile on his face.

"You're right kiddo!" He slipped off the tie in one motion, compelling applause from Rachel.

"Now you look great!"

His neck was clean of all stubble. His neatly ironed shirt, that accented his eyes, showed his thin, fit frame. Rachel's hair was curled and her childlike dress contrasted with her confident and demanding attitude. He was proud of her spunk.

-Huddy-

When they arrived at the courthouse, there seemed to be a horde of people waiting for them: Wilson, Chase, Foreman, Taub, Goff, Arlene, and Julia.

"Cuddy, aren't you afraid of the board firing you for misusing hospital funds?" He whispered to her jokingly, as they approached the hoard.

She obviously had no idea what he was suggesting.

"You paid them to come."

"I did no such thing; believe it or not they want this for you."

As the four of them approached the group, the rounds of greetings began. Social niceties were never his thing and he often was overcome with a desire to ruin the custom when expected to participate. He managed to keep out of it by holding Rachel. She was content to stay in the spotlight, while they ignored him.

"Hey, I thought people normally shaved for court?" Chase joked, eyeing him up and down.

He was greeted with a light slap on his shoulder from Rachel. "He looks nice!"

The adults could do nothing but snicker at her earnest. There was NO arguing with her! She was right and there was no other opinion to be had.

"You better listen to her. She's worse than her mother." This earned him a smack from Cuddy.

He hated the look that everyone was giving him. He didn't need their pity for a life spent alone. He didn't need their well-wishing. Nor did he need this fake kumbaya routine. Then their conversation was interrupted.

-Huddy-

It was a court employee who approached them from a long hallway.

"Excuse me but are any of you, Dr. House or Dr. Cuddy?"

This wasn't how things were supposed to go. This wasn't what any of them expected. Adoptions were done with joy in the courtroom. The only thing this could mean is something was wrong. Dread filled his soul and then anger arose soon behind. _Of course, every damn person he knew was here to witness my utter and complete failure._

"We are them." Cuddy answered.

"The judge would like to speak with the two of you in his office."

_Just the two of us? _ They both thought.

They left Rachel with Blythe and the crew, much to her protests, and followed the lady down the hall.

"Judge, Doctors Cuddy, and House to see you, sir." She said introducing them before leaving.

"Ah yes, take a seat would you?"

"I'd rather stand thanks." House was adamant, his eyebrows drawn together, leaning both hands on his cane in front of him.

"House, please." But she knew that look on his face. There was no reasoning with it and reason would only serve to tend his rebellion.

"If you wish, Dr. House." The judge laced his fingers together on his desk in front of him. "As you both suspected this isn't typically how this process goes. If a parent of a child signs to give custody to another, it's typically a fast process. However, there are a few things in your history that concern me. You were a drug addict, your relationship has been on again off again for the past year and a half, and from what I hear you disregard both medical and legal guidelines."

"He has changed so much since he got clean and he's seeing a counselor. We have a long history together and both have had to work out some things-"

"Don't bother Lisa he's made up his mind already. Haven't you?" House interrupted, shooting the Judge a stern look.

"I have. At this time I'm not comfortable signing these papers. I-"

"That's all I need to hear thanks!" House blurted out as he stormed from the room. He wanted to throw things. He needed to break something. _Why did I pretend that this would work? Of course, he won't give me custody, what person in their right mind would? Will Cuddy too begin to see reason? _It wasn't a second later that Cuddy, whose face was flushed with anger, joined him in the hall. His breaths were heavy and his eyes ablaze.

"Greg-"

"Don't pretend he's not right!" She turned him from his pacing to face her.

"I understand why he did it but he hasn't seen what I've seen. Do you think Rachel really cares if those papers get signed? No, she cares that you're there to read her Peter Pan and watch that dirty pirate show together." Her voice was earnest but he couldn't help but roll his eyes.

"That stuff doesn't matter!"

"Yes, it does! You are there for her. When she throws a fit, you're there. When she has a nightmare, you're there! You are more of a father to her than many custody holding biological parents."

His mother's words came back to him; 'You're already a better father than he was.' 'You had such a big heart. I can still see it.' 'People don't change; they just get led off course.' His load began to lighten. _Maybe they were right._

"Screw the courts, you're her father." He couldn't help but smile at the irony of the situation. Usually, she lectured him to listen more to laws and standards. His burden had lifted enough to rejoin the crowd that awaited them.

-Huddy-

"So?" Taub beckoned.

"She's mine." He answered, managing a smile. Rachel struggled out of Wilson's hold and ran into House's arms. The congratulatory line began as each person offered their sickeningly pleasant words.

"Let's get a picture!" Wilson commanded.

Rachel screamed with joy over the suggestion. Lisa and House stood in the back with Rachel between them in the front. Lisa's joy was radiating hope. House's face was straight and the ends of his lips forced upwards as he ticked Rachel who laughed and squirmed in every picture.

Later, at lunch, Rachel introduced herself to everyone who came to the table "My name is Rachel Cuddy-House and this is my dad! We went to the courthouse today!" Lisa and Blythe looked on lovingly but the seer of rejection and failure resurfaced for House every time.

-Huddy-

The following day Blythe's visit was over. She stood at the door with her bags, as the cab waited for her on the curb.

Rachel rubbed away the tears from her eyes.

"I don't want you to leave." She gasped for breath.

"I know sweetie but I have to go home. I've been invited back to see the baby once it's born." Blythe bent down, wrapping her arms around the child.

"That's too long! Why do you live so far away?" Her voice was soft.

"That's where I lived with my husband." This was the first Rachel heard about her Grandma having a husband.

"Where is he?"

"He died a few years ago." The phrase came out heavy. There were so many mix emotions there…too many unresolved issues.

"Oh…you must be lonely." It took a beat for Blythe to answer

"I have some friends there." The truth was evident in her eyes, she wanted to be closer.

"She'll need someone to show her what a grandma is supposed to be like. We know Arlene won't! Plus we could use the free babysitting." It was more than she could ask for from her son. Tears missed her eyes; maybe she could sell the house and move closer…


	15. A Life of Regrets

Chapter 15: A Life of Regrets

A/N: I know many of us are trying to get through this Covid-19 thing. I hope you find this entertaining and just remember...I have an entire story after this one, so don't give up hope!

As the weeks passed, it seemed like their home life had settled into a routine, although Cuddy could feel House's uneasiness. She couldn't tell if it was the domesticity of his new life or the dwindling days before he was to become a father of two. He often paced the floor and performed small acts of rebellion to his new life. One night, instead of heading home for dinner, he went straight to a bar and stayed long after Rachel had gone to bed. Cuddy couldn't reach him and he never responded.

After knowing him so long she had developed something of a sixth sense about his upcoming rebellions. It was like a parent with a child when things seem to perfect and quiet, you know something is about to go down. She knew to expect moments like these, not that it made them any easier. Rachel took them in stride most days. House and Rachel's relationship had grown and seemed to be losing some of its novelty. That also was to be expected and oddly enough gave her solace. It is easy to be entranced in the novelty of a relationship or situation and romanticize it. It was something else to be as loyal to it after that novelty fades.

Cuddy still had yet to lighten up on her work. There was always more to do. Whether it is to prepare Foreman, make up for lost donors, or special meetings to ensure the continued health of the hospital. Her workload as Dean of Medicine was heavy and while Foreman took a large chunk of responsibly from her, things seemed to grow from nowhere. She had time for all those little things she had wanted to do for years but which had simply fallen to the wayside. 

Most nights of the week she came home to House and Rachel halfway through eating. Other nights, when she did make it home, dinner fell upon her to make. House seemed irritated more and more by her "lack of respect for her health." Her body and mind were used to working this hard for weeks at a time. It's not like hours like these were rare for her. She didn't feel the pregnancy should hold her back from her usual routine. It wasn't any more stress than she was used to. They finally worked out a deal that she would take her blood pressure a couple times a day. A few instances she found it was higher than desired but nothing to cause too much panic.

The fundraising gala was approaching at the end of the week. It always included a lot of planning and coordination. Foreman was making the process much easier than past years, but he still had a lot to learn about preparing one.

-Huddy-

Wilson found Cuddy sitting alone at a lunch table. She was halfway through a salad with an oatmeal cookie for dessert.

"Eating alone today?" Wilson asked taking a seat opposite her.

"Yeah, House is at Nolan's this afternoon."

There was something in her tone. "What did he do now?"

"Oh, nothing." Wilson gave her an unbelieving gaze. "Instead of moving forward with crazy procedures he has been sending one of his fellows for every band-aid they apply."

"Are you sure you're feeling okay? You're mad that he's asking permission for too much?"

She put down her fork. "It's not that. He's sending them to check up on me. He's convinced that I'm overworking myself."

Wilson broke eye contact, suddenly finding his lunch very interesting. _Damn it not him too._

"I'm not! My body is used to this workload."

"I didn't say a word." Wilson defended, not meeting her eyes. "Have you two picked any names out?"

"House hasn't picked out any, as far as I know. Any time I bring it up he distracts from the conversation."

"Okay then, what names do you have in mind?"

"I want a Jewish name. I was thinking David, Isaac, or my favorite Benjamin." Her eyes were a glow. "Benjamin was my favorite Uncle's name. He was a bit of a maverick compared to the rest of the Cuddys. He was the baby of the group."

"Sounds like the perfect name for House's kid."

-Huddy-

House had continued his sessions with Nolan because of the desperate request from Cuddy. With everything going on at home and with the pregnancy, his anxiety had him drained most of the time. As the weeks continued it got more and more difficult to find the energy to want to go back.

"You seem to be watching Rachel a lot lately."

"Cuddy stays late pretty often." House stood looking out the window, with his back to Nolan.

It was something Nolan found House doing when he sought a relaxing escape. He may still not want to be there but he was easier to talk to in times like these.

"What do you think about that?"

"That she is pushing herself more than ever to keep control over her domain and is soon going to find her breaking point."

"How does that play out in your mind?"

House's head fell. "It's not my mind that keeps me up at night."

"Have you not been sleeping? Are you having dreams or flashbacks?"

"Dreams mostly, they're so real. I can feel her hot tears on my shirt and smell the sterile smell of the hospital."

"What happens in the dreams?"

"She loses the fetus. Either she has a wreck or miscarries, or complications happen that she wrote off too long."

"Have you told her about them?" Nolan softly inquired.

"No! What good will it do? She doesn't listen to me now. It won't do any good spouting off anxiety-fueled dreams."

They would return to this later in the session but as for now, House had reached his limit.

-Huddy-

That night House woke up in a cold sweat from another of his regular nightmares. After the contents of the dream, the worst part was jerking awake which caused spasms through his leg. He sat on the edge of the bed and gathered his composure, rubbing his spazzing remainder of muscle. He forced his rapid breath to slow and his mind to reorientate to the world around him.

'If you can't tell her, tell your child your hopes or your fears. It might not understand you but voicing them will help.' He remembered Nolan advising earlier. _This is stupid._

Laying beside her he began to speak and soon placed his hand on the growing abdomen. It wasn't something he made a habit of doing, touching the growing bump. It was a rush of reality that made him wish he could run again.

"This is stupid." he began to whisper. "You better be healthy when you come out of there. I wish you could keep your mother in check. Make her nauseous or something." His thoughts continued until he was back asleep with his hand still resting on her bump. As stupid as he felt, it did help.

-Huddy-

It was finally the night of the Gala and Cuddy was not feeling up for the night's festivities. It had been a long last couple weeks and after that morning she was ready to get back home to her family. She awoke to find him spooning her with his long fingers stretched over her swollen abdomen. She had longed for that moment since the moment she found out. That closeness with the father of the child she carried, with the man she loved. For now, she was sentenced to a night of schmoozing donors.

"Are you feeling alright?" Wilson asked

"I'm fine! Don't tell me House told you to keep an eye on me." 

"Of course he would never ask. But you looked distracted."

"I'm ready to get home, I have a bit of a headache."

This prompted an alarmed look from Wilson. Cuddy rolled her eyes and waved off his concern.

"Not you too. I'm fine! Pregnancy doesn't make me an invalid." 

-Huddy-

Cuddy left just an hour before and Rachel was playing mightly before it was finally time for bed. She was wearing a pair of pink pajamas as she fed and rocked her baby doll. 

"Dad, can you show me how to wrap it?" She asked holding the doll out to him. 

It was something they had gone over. A baby is in a tight place in its mother's tummy so when it's first born, you wrap it up tight so it feels safe. He took the doll, not parting his eyes from the TV screen and wrapped it tightly. It wasn't that he didn't want to be there but tonight he could have really used some time away, a breather. 

Rachel hounded him with questions since the moment her mother left for the gala. He was thankful not to be dragged to that tonight. Cuddy may want to run herself ragged but he always valued a night of relaxation. 

After several seasons they were finally going to find out who Jessica had cheated with on Tom when Rachel screamed with excitement. 

"Did you see that? It did a perfect flip!"

There was no rewinding live TV on Cuddy's low tech system. He missed it!

"Rachel! Stop screaming! You're supposed to be winding down for bed."

Her little eyes widened at his chastisement. Rarely did he yell at her, instead she got instructional jesting. Then his cell phone rang.

"Yep," House answered, it was Wilson. 

"It's about Cuddy. I had to take her to the Emergency Room-"

That's the last House heard before he was stricken with panic. He had to get there, she had to be okay.

"Rachel get your shoes on!"

When she turned to look she saw the fear on his face.

"What? Why? Where are we going? Isn't it bedtime?-"

"Do what I said!" his eyes mean and his posture tense.

With tears running down her face, he scooped her up with a pair of shoes and rushed out the door to the car. He hoped this would soon be another dream that he would wake up from.

A/N: I know some of you may be super pissed, just hold on! Troubles and trials overcome, prove to strengthen people, couples, and families. I hate a sad ending as much as any of you! we still have a way to go! 


	16. Don't Give Up Hope

Chapter 16: Don't Give Up Hope

A/N: Another update! Thank you for the reviews! They really do keep me motivated!

-Huddy-

Cuddy and House sat in a patient room waiting for Dr. Kraydel. It had been over a week since her incident. The whole time she was confined to bed rest and reluctantly obeyed the Doctor's orders, with much supervision from House. The days of inactivity nearly drove her crazy! Her mind was so full of projects that needed to be done she could hardly keep her mind on the books she attempted to read. Rachel, of course, didn't understand why her mommy couldn't hold her. She hoped Dr. Kraydel would take her off bed rest and allow her to return to the hospital for a few hours a week.

House, on the other hand, hoped that Kraydel would know that if he gave Cuddy an inch, she would take a mile. If Cuddy returned to work, no one would be able to pry her away. She would overestimate herself again and they would end up in the same place, or worse. He shuddered to think about it.

When Dr. Kraydel entered he was startled by the stark difference of expressions the two held. Cuddy, a hopeful expression, while House's was formidable and stern. He wasn't there to be fed any sort of bullshit. He was going to protect Cuddy and his baby no matter what. Kraydel took a deep breath, put on a smile, and began.

"Hello, Doctors. I've brought you some good news! Dr. Cuddy, it seems that the time off has helped stabilize your condition. Your levels are all within an acceptable range. I am willing to take you off bed rest, but I do not want you to start work again for at least another two weeks, I'll reevaluate you then."

"Alright Doc, before you let us go, explain to her in more precise terms what you mean by off bed rest but not returning to work," House demanded

"House!" Cuddy slapped his arm. "I know what he meant! I care about this baby too believe it or not!"

Fury shot across House's face. "Yeah? You mean the baby you're carrying or the hospital? I think you made it pretty clear which you want to protect more!"

The shock and hurt on Cuddy's face struck Kraydel's heartstrings.

"Now Dr. House, we all can overestimate ourselves at times and we both know how worried Dr. Cuddy was at the hospital. There are also underlying conditions that put her at a greater risk than the average population."

"All the more reason for her to listen to me when I ask her to take it easy." House retorted bitterly.

"You know what, I'm not going to listen to this. YOU are stressing me out. I'm going home." Tears strained her eyes and her tense voice strained at the words as she left.

-Huddy-

House finally settled in his office, after checking for Cuddy around the hospital and receiving a text from Marina assuring that Cuddy had made it home. Her text also included some very choice words for House for causing Lisa to come home so distressed, but she'll get over it.

It was one of the most frightening times in his life. Wilson's call had him so startled that he missed half of what he said. All he caught was Cuddy taken to hospital, extreme pain, and fainting. Other than his fight with Rachel the rest was a blur. He finally got her loaded and took off speeding down the road to the hospital. Of course, this was a night the cops were out and he got pulled over.

*Flashback*

His hands shook as he pilfered through his glove box for his papers when he found a familiar orange bottle. His heart slowed for a moment at the thought of peace that lay just inside. He could push all this away until it had passed. He could be there for her if only he could take some pills. It was then a flashlight shined in his face.

"License and registration please."

It was enough to stir him from his temptation and he quickly handed him the documents and offered his explanation. He wasn't in the mood to fight with the officer, he had to get to the hospital. It seemed though that luck was on his side today. The officer escorted him to the hospital.

When he got to the hospital he met Wilson at the door.

"They are okay, they're stable."

"What the hell happened?" House asked frantically as he held Rachel and tried to look past Wilson into the room.

"We were sitting in the dining hall when the first contraction it. She thought she could just walk it off so I went with her. It happened again and again, then she passed out. I called 911 and the ambulance came."

It was then that two little brown eyes began to blink awake. "What? Is mommy okay?"

"Yes, sweetie," Wilson assured, patting her little back, and hoping it would ward off tears.

"But you said…you said…" She sniffed.

"Here will you take her? I have to go see Lisa." House offered Wilson the child, impatiently.

"Dad! No! Daddy!" She pleaded from Wilson's arms.

"He's only going in the room to see your mommy. She is really tired and they have lots of things on her to keep track of things. She wouldn't want to scare you. She'll be okay, so don't you worry."

-Huddy-

In the room, Cuddy was asleep, no doubt as a result of a drug they had her on. A fetal heart monitor was hooked around her belly and other wires tracking her heart. All levels seemed fine. She was also receiving IV fluids.

She looked so pale, you could see the bags under her eyes, but she was alive. For the first time since the ominous call, he allowed himself to take a deep breath. His hands were beginning to stop shaking as he sat near her bedside.

How stupid is it to sit near a sick person's bedside…If they are asleep or unconscious you aren't helping them. If they are awake you might be keeping them from boredom but they still feel guilty for chaining you to their bedside, to begin with. Nobody wants to be stuck in a hospital room. As a doctor, you could at least be working on a cure or treatment plan.

If Nolan was here he would tell him that was Dr. Kraydel's job, not his. He would tell him that his job is to stay with Lisa and to be there when she wakes up. He was right, she would want him there when she woke up. It was going to be a long night.

Some hair had worked its way loose and fallen in her face, so he gently pushed it away. His anger came and went. _If she had only listened to him if he had only used his full powers to keep her from overworking herself… She never wanted this. The look on her face the night she lost Joy flashed through his mind, she was heartbroken. But damn it, she knew this would be a difficult pregnancy_! His mind tired with his repeated arguments.

Nolan's advice yet again slipped past the tornado of worry, "if you can't tell her, tell the baby." He placed his hand on her swollen stomach.

"You have no hope kid. Your parents are two of the most stubborn people on this Earth. I give you permission to kick your mom really hard when she's working too much."

-Huddy-

Hours passed and Wilson had long since made it back to their place with Rachel when Cuddy's eye's fluttered open.

"House? Oh, House I'm so sorry." She pleaded as tears streamed her face.

"Look who's awake. Do you remember what happened?" His eyes held as hard as stone against her tears.

"I had a few huge contractions and then everything went black. I only have flashes after that."

It was unlike her to be this timid, of course…it was unlike her to be this wrong too. She was the responsible one, the one everyone could count on… He was too mad to keep his seat next to her bedside.

"You and the baby are stable for now. But you worked yourself into that bed Lisa! You were worried I wasn't ready for this when it was you who wasn't. Is your job still this damn important to you?"

"Greg, you know it's not! Please just-" She pleaded as she reached for him, hoping he would sit back down next to her.

"You're awake now. I did my part. I'm going back home with Rachel."

His tone was enough to split her open. It felt as if her heart was going to burst like a thrown water balloon. She sat alone and in her hospital room, haunted by the result of her carelessness, and the continuous forgiving beat of her baby's heart.

-Huddy-

Before House could make his way out the front doors he was met by Goff.

"Dr. House, I heard what happened. Are Dr. Cuddy and the baby okay?"

He really wasn't up for this conversation at the moment. If one thing could have gone right today it would have been not running into Mrs. Believes in the Fairy Godfather in the Sky.

"I really don't have time for this."

"Oh, are you getting the car to take her home?" Her eyes held nothing but honest curiosity. He could find no intent for manipulation for information in them.

"Why are you here so early?"

"So that's not why you're leaving. I suppose you are pretty mad. I know you've been worried about her working so much."

He looked exhausted. They had worked many late-night cases but she had never seen House look so worn. Bags hung under his eyes and the slump in his back had multiplied over what seemed to be a very long night.

"I'm really not up for one of our little talks right now."

"Okay, that's fair…just remember don't give up hope. Love is the best motivator."

*End of Flashback*

"We got the results back…" Taub announced, barging into his office. "…it was positive; I was going to start the treatment. Is everything okay?"

"I was just daydreaming of the great sex me and Cuddy had last night."

Taub knew he was distracting from the real issue but he also knew that he shy from elaborating with details if pushed.

"I'll just go…"

Was everything okay? He couldn't stop thinking about those pills he found in his glove box. His body ached for the release they gave. They lay in his pocket now, burning a hole through the material. He had to get rid of them. He couldn't stand them being this close. If it had been any other time any time before his relationship with Cuddy…they would have long since been enjoyed. Maybe Goff was right, love is a great motivator to do what needs to be done.


End file.
